


In This Together

by Alyca



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Brienne doesn't want Jaime to be a pet, Eventual Jon Snow/Daenerys Targaryen, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Inspired by Game of Thrones, Jaime is a Commander not Brienne's Pet!, Jon Snow Knows Something, Mild Smut, Past Cersei Lannister/Jaime Lannister
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-12
Updated: 2019-08-06
Packaged: 2020-06-26 23:35:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 31,996
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19778794
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alyca/pseuds/Alyca
Summary: “And she killed the bear with the wooden sword?” Tyrion’s face became even more intrigued by Jaime’s attempt to give an explanation of how Lady Brienne ended up with a priceless sword and Jaime without his priceless hand.“Not exactly. I jumped into the pit to distract the bear, so she could get out.”Tyrion silently stared at Jaime for a few moments until he started talking again, albeit slowly. “You jumped into a pit in the enemy’s territory, one-handed and presumably unarmed, to save Lady Brienne from a bear?”The story starts in Winterfell post-funeral, then an alternative plot unfolds:Jaime feels useless in the North and wants to help. Brienne is more than a bodyguard. Tyrion and Jaime plot together.Jaime and Brienne get a happy ending which is true to their characters.An alternative show ending post 08x03 to give justice to both villains and heroes.It does not try to make sense of the nonsensical, it establishes how the story could have ended with everyone in-character.This is my first published fic. I have everything written and the chapters are in-editing! I love comments, so I can improve my work :-)





	1. Brothers

_ Synopsis: Tyrion has a private chat with Jaime and points out the obvious.  _

**_\- Tyrion’s chambers -_ **

**\- JAIME -**

_ Tyrion had travelled through the ruins of Valyria, bravely faced the Dragon Queen in distant lands, survived the army of the dead, and yet Tyrion had stayed the same at heart.  _

Jaime was strangely fascinated by his little brother, who had more scars than he used to, drank a little less, and the lines on his face told the story of the many worries he has had to endure. And yet, despite increasingly looking like an ageing, wary lion instead of an adventurous cub, Tyrion had not lost any of his wit and ability to draw out the strongest of emotions in other people. 

“This cannot be your entire explanation, it does not even explain why you stood longer than a minute,” Tyrion teased. “You are a one-handed man who is -forgive me, dear brother- long past his glory days, in distant icy lands far from home, on the front line, without your army, and you are telling me you survived the dead because you practiced a lot with Bronn?”

Jaime was not sure if he should laugh, be insulted, or maybe be insulted on Bronn’s behalf. Had training with Bronn not been Tyrion’s idea? He and his brother were sitting alone in Tyrion’s chambers around his -as he called it- writing desk, armed with a flask of wine, two cups, apples and some cheese with bread. Lady Sansa was being generous in supplying the survivors with the best Winterfell could offer. It was arguably not the best by the standards of any Southern house, not even by the standards of most field camps Jaime had called his home, and yet this wine and stale bread somehow tasted better than anything else he had ever tasted.  _ Better than any of the feasts in King’s Landing.  _

Was it because he had come closer to death than he had ever before? Jaime lingered on this thought. He had been close to death before, the closest surely on his fateful journey to Harrenhal. Those days were mostly spent in a feverish delirium. The reality of his impending demise, however, had been only a distant echo on his mind. He was a seasoned warrior and had witnessed many battles, saw countless men die beside him.  _ Through my blade. _ The brutality, senselessness and unfairness of death were nothing new he had just learned. He knew the guttural noise and the lingering stench of death. And yet, the tension before the battle and the relief after victory here was different. 

The feeling coming from deep down in his stomach and slowly creeping up, choking him from the inside during the battle in Winterfell was a kind of terror he had not experienced before. Was it the darkness and cold that had engulfed them, the inability to look the enemy in the eye? The uncertainty of whom or what they faced? Riding to Winterfell, Jaime knew it was death they would be fighting, corpses brought back to an eerie half-life. He had been prepared for this and it came as no surprise when a half-rotten brother of the Night’s Watch lifted his sword against him. And yet, he had never feared death like this before. 

The funeral on the preceding morning had moved Jaime more than he had anticipated. The day before, he spent contemplating if the Northern men even wanted him to attend, or if he was just an unwelcome distraction, a reminder of the death House Lannister had brought them in the many wars of bygone years. In the end, Jaime figured they were brothers in arms now and if Dothraki Bloodriders attended a funeral outside the frozen walls of Winterfell, he would not be the biggest curiosity on site. 

Jaime did not personally know any of the dead, he did not even know any of their names except Jorah Mormont and the Greyjoy boy.  _ The one who came to fight for Lady Sansa after taking her home when it was all she had left.  _ Lord Snow made a formidable impression when he gave the eulogy, he had become a man and left behind the boy Jaime had mocked the last time he was in Winterfell.  _ Fate has not spared him either.  _ The Dragon Queen either lost or let down her icy facade when she cried for Ser Jorah. He must have been more than her advisor and protector.  _ Maybe she really is different than her father?  _

His mind back in the present, Jaime decided to release his brother from the agony of trying to solve the mystery of how a lion without his paw survived while thousands of Unsullied perished. “I was without my army, but I was not alone as you surely remember.” 

“Ah, of course, your Lady Knight!” Tyrion proudly proclaimed, sounding more like a proud Maester confirming his young student had given the correct answer than an expression of genuine surprise. 

“Do not call her that, it is  _ Ser Brienne _ if you want to address her as a knight. And she is not  _ my _ knight,” Jaime snorted. 

Tyrion rolled his eyes and raised his eyebrows at the same time, grasping for the flask of wine to refill their cups. “Well, you made her a knight, so she is  _ your _ knight. Why have you never told me of her, anyways?” 

“Have I not?” Jaime was surprised at himself. Why had he not?  _ Because when she brought you back to King’s Landing, Joeffrey died at his own wedding and Tyrion was arrested for poisoning him before murdering Tywin.  _ Jaime remembered those horrid days fearing for his brother’s life, did not want to bring them to Winterfell. “I guess I did not want to talk about the details of losing my sword hand,” he chose as a less disturbing answer than the truth. 

“When she spoke at your trial it sounded like you shared more than this particularly exciting moment,” Tyrion both ascertained and inquired. 

“We shared nothing; I was her prisoner. After I lost my hand, she ensured that I did not die in a pitch beside the bloody road. Now she protects Lady Sansa. Is that not enough to rightfully knight her?” Jaime was putting his defences up. 

“I did not question why you knighted her,” Tyrion was calmer now. “And no, it is not really enough to not let you die. Any half-decent squire would have done that. Possibly even Bronn, in anticipation of payment. My question was why you lost your hand and gave our newly forged Valyrian family sword to this previously unknown woman who, according to you, had done nothing but take care of you while you were sick.”

“She did more than that,” Jaime exhaled, “and I gave her Oathkeeper to protect Lady Sansa. I had made a promise to Lady Catelyn.” 

“You say that like it explains why you thought she was qualified to wield a priceless weapon most Lords would kill for calling their own.” Tyrion was getting annoyed at Jaime’s obvious evasiveness. 

“She fought me before we got captured. My hands were in shackles, but I could tell how great of a fighter she was. And I saw her bravery when she faced the bear.”

“What BEAR?” Tyrion looked strangely amused. 

_ Oh.  _

“Well, the bear. Bolton’s men put her in a pit to fight a bear with a wooden sword in Harrenhal,” Jaime explained with an expression and voice as if this were a normal occurrence. 

“And she killed the bear with the wooden sword?” Tyrion’s face became even more intrigued by Jaime’s attempt to give an explanation of how Lady Brienne ended up with a priceless sword and Jaime without his priceless hand. 

“Not exactly. I jumped into the pit to distract the bear, so she could get out.” 

Tyrion silently stared at Jaime for a few moments until he started talking again, albeit slowly. “You jumped into a pit in the enemy’s territory, one-handed and presumably unarmed, to save Lady Brienne from a bear?”

“Yes,” Jaime confirmed matter-of-factly. 

“Did Bolton’s men want you to fight the bear as well, then?” Tyrion tried to make sense of this, waving his cup. 

“No, I was already well on my way back to King’s Landing when I decided it would be unwise to leave Lady Brienne behind. So I went back to get her,” Jaime tried to be more specific so Tyrion would stop being so damn inquisitive. Qyburn’s words were now harking in Jaime’s mind.  _ She will be their entertainment for tonight.  _

“So, you were safely on the road to King’s Landing, but came back to save a random woman whose greatest achievements you had witnessed were not dying whilst fighting you with your hands shackled, and wiping your arse while you were sick?” Tyrion shook his head, laughed and looked at Jaime in complete disbelief. 

_ That is not how it was, you idiot.  _

“It was the honourable thing to do and those were not her only achievements,” Jaime hissed and almost tried to justify one of his most honourable deeds. 

“Fine then, enough of the bear,” Tyrion shook his head again and gave up on getting the details. “Enough poorly executed evasive manoeuvres to explain why Lady Brienne would risk her position and possibly life to defend you in front Lady Sansa to whom she is sworn, Queen Daenerys who very much wanted you to have a personal audience with Drogon, and an assembly of Northern Lords who would have cheered the dragon on while he burned you to a crisp. All while she was wearing our family sword.” 

Jaime had an immediate urge to explain that Oathkeeper was now Lady Brienne’s sword and not the Lannister family sword. Not wanting to risk any more questions he remained silent. His eyes remained focused on the castle walls behind the stained glass window rather than his brother’s probing eyes. 

Tyrion did not relent, however. “My dearest brother, are you trying to fool me or only yourself?” 

Jaime felt confused and caught at the same time. “What do you mean? I told you the truth,” he defended himself from his brother’s accusing stare. 

“Jaime, we have not spent much time together here, but it does not take the most experienced or intelligent man to see how you react whenever this woman enters a room or you hear her voice in the distance,” Tyrion calmly stated as if Jaime needed to have his own behaviour explained to himself by someone. “I also do not believe how you knighted her resembles how this is commonly done, and by that I do not mean the absurd situation of facing an army of corpses later on.”

Jaime blankly stared at his brother, reassembling his thoughts to come to a non-disconcerting conclusion about what Tyrion’s words could mean. 

“Jaime, you clearly care for her far beyond how somebody cares for an acquaintance, or fellow soldier,” Tyrion’s words and face were now filled with a kindness he rarely displayed anymore. “You love this woman,” and he quickly added to reassure his brother, “and I do understand what you see in her.”

A long silence followed between the brothers, as Jaime could feel the heaviness of those words settling down on his shoulders, not angry at Tyrion’s discovery, but preoccupied with the meaning it implied. His cup had long been emptied and yet Jaime could do nothing but stare at it, like a fortune-teller begging the last few droplets of wine to give him the answer to a riddle. 

He finally whispered an answer, meeting his brother’s eyes again. “Neither of us is very good at talking about such things,” Jaime seemed to accept Tyrion’s conclusion without putting up a fight. “And the situation is hardly ideal.” 

Tyrion put on a more cheerful face again. “Well, you might, but I will not let this unique opportunity pass. Go find a way to talk to her about your feelings, or I will.”

“Are you threatening me?” Jaime exclaimed in panic. 

“No, I’m encouraging you to do the obvious out of brotherly love. You have until nightfall before I find a way to tell her,” Tyrion smirked and refilled his cup. 


	2. The Feast

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tyrion plays his game

**_\- Winterfell Main Hall -_ **

**\- JAIME -**

The noise in the overcrowded dining hall was deafening when Jaime entered. Wildlings, North men, even some Dothraki and Unsullied had found their way to the victory celebration, sharing wine, bread, and tales. The cheerfulness and exuberance filled the air with an unusual intensity. Social boundaries blurred to a slightly worrisome degree as girls from Wintertown mingled with the brave soldiers and Wildlings. 

_ There will be so many bastards in Winterfell. Stinking Wildling bastards. _

Jaime saw that Brienne and Podrick had found their way into the hall after an exhausting day of trying to reestablish at least a basic order in the stronghold. The battle was won, but the castle was filled with survivors that needed to be taken care of, and people capable of organising such a venture were sparse. 

“May I?” Jaime glanced toward Brienne from behind, gesturing at the spot opposite of her. 

“Of course,” she looked a bit surprised at the question. 

“Did you have a good day, my lady?” Jaime tried to open a conversation, immediately regretting this profoundly inconsiderate question as soon as the words left his mouth. 

_ Of course she did not. What is good about attending a funeral for thousands of fallen soldiers and then taking care of a half-destroyed castle?  _

Thankfully, Brienne did not really try to give an answer, but instead asked Jaime about his day in return. “Yes, thank you. Did you have the time to speak with your brother? There must be so much to discuss between the two of you now that we have survived the dead.” 

_ More than you can imagine.  _

Before Jaime could try to give an answer, Tyrion’s voice interrupted him from the background. “Why do you have no wine on your table? This is a victory feast, not a council meeting! Pod, go fetch some flasks and cups,” Tyrion winked his eye at Podrick who readily jumped up to fulfil his former master’s request. 

Tyrion exchanged a quick glance with Jaime and immediately put up an accusing look.  _ Of course  _ Jaime had not talked to Brienne about his feelings. Tyrion was angry, but not surprised, taking a seat next to his brother. 

Podrick promptly came back with the goods Tyrion had requested, four cups and a flask of fine Dornish wine. “This will not last long,” Tyrion joked, filling the cups to the brim, toasting, “to victory!”

Jaime noted in his mind that Brienne seemed unusually at ease this evening. She was undoubtedly relieved that all of them had miraculously survived, just as Tyrion had predicted before the battle. 

_ I survived because of you.  _

“Let us play a game!” Tyrion suddenly blurted out. “I have invented this game where I guess things about you and when I am right you have to drink! Pod, you already know the game. I will start with you.”

Jaime was suddenly alarmed, like an animal trapped in a cage before the butcher’s shop, awaiting the axe that will end its life.  _ He would not dare, would he?  _

“Pod, you came into my service after stealing a ham.” 

Podrick was obviously confused by this. “But I told you that, my Lord.”

Tyrion rolled his eyes, “I am merely demonstrating how the game works, Pod. Now drink.” Podrick gleefully raised his cup to his lips and took a large gulp, lamenting that wine had become a rather rare delicacy in his life. 

“Lady Brienne, you are an only child,” Tyrion looked at her with anticipation until Brienne raised her cup, taking a notably smaller sip than Podrick. 

“You danced with Renly Baratheon.”

“Tyrion, how did you know that?” Brienne was visibly surprised, but dutifully obeyed the rules and drank some more. 

“So many things have come to my knowledge, my lady,” Tyrion smirked. 

Jaime was usually entertained by Tyrion’s games, but felt horrified by whatever his little brother was brewing up behind his mischievous eyes.  _ I should have just told her, bloody hell.  _

“Jaime, you once lost a fight against a stable boy,” Tyrion turned to his brother. Brienne was visibly amused by this. 

“I will grant you this one, even though you hardly guessed. And just to clarify,” Jaime turned to Brienne while drinking from his cup, “I was eight-years old and he was two heads taller than me.”

Tyrion was not done with his brother. “You have never named any of your swords before gifting Oathkeeper to Brienne.”

Jaime’s look changed into an expression of growing terror.  _ Stop it, this is not a game.  _ “I did not name it, Brienne named it,” Jaime replied whilst putting up his usual smug face.  _ Tyrion, you will regret this.  _

“But you did ask me to name it and I always say it is your sword!” Brienne was not being very supportive of Jaime’s attempt to deflect the question, not realising Tyrion was moving closer to his target. 

Tyrion gave Jaime a telling look.  _ My sword, my family sword.  _

“Fine, I did ask you to name it,” Jaime agreed in a rather docile manner, hoping that compliance might alter his fate. 

Tyrion paused, looking at his brother with a face of pure satisfaction. “You are in love with Lady Brienne.” 

_ You did not just speak those words.  _

Jaime was mortified and, unusually for him, completely devoid of words. Should he drink now, or not? Punch his little brother? What difference did it make. What was said could not be unsaid. He dared a quick glance at Brienne to assess the situation before contemplating his strategy. She only stared at him with a look of pure panic. Jaime knew exactly what she was thinking. Brienne believed this was just another cruel joke played on her to amuse the general public at her expense. 

_ Gods, I am sorry.  _

Jaime wondered how to give her an opportunity to gracefully escape from the trap his little brother had so carefully laid out for them.  _ For us.  _

More experienced with removing herself from uncomfortable situations than Jaime, Brienne stoically raised from her bench before being on her way out of the dining hall, “Please excuse me, I need to breathe some fresh air.”


	3. Ghosts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Synopsis: Jaime contemplates his options and gets visited by a ghost

**_\- a lonely hallway in Winterfell -_ **

**\- JAIME -**

Jaime was angry at his brother, but knew he had little cause. Tyrion had spoken the truth, after all, and he had warned him in advance. Jaime had not taken his chance to avoid the attack and now he had to make a move to at least save his and Brienne’s dignity.  _ How would she be feeling now? She truly did not deserve this. _

Jaime contemplated his options as calmly as he could. After Brienne exited, Tyrion had given Jaime two cups and a flask of wine without giving a verbal explanation of what he expected Jaime to do now. But Jaime did not know what to do, so he found himself standing in a cold and dark hallway, the flask and a cup resting on a window shelf, the other cup in Jaime’s hand. He raised it to his mouth, emptying it for the second time. 

He could go back to the dining hall, pretending he had not found Brienne. This was too cowardly to further contemplate and Tyrion would immediately know. Since he had moved into Tyrion’s chambers after his arrival, making a quiet retreat to his own room was also out of the question. He could stay here in the hallway, or sleep in the now wight-free library, but this would not be of any use to comfort Brienne. No, he had to go talk to her. But to tell her what? 

Jaime wondered what he really felt for Brienne, a task he had strangely avoided after his afternoon talk with Tyrion. The truth was, he did not know. Brienne mattered more to him than any normal acquaintance or fellow warrior, Tyrion had correctly observed. He did think about her unusually often, even while in King’s Landing, wondering if she was safe. The recurring thought of her being unsafe always terrified him to his bones.  _ She will be their entertainment for tonight. _

He had dismissed these thoughts as normal concern for a friend, and yet he never thought about anyone else like this. He never had the urge to put his arms around a friend he had not seen in a long time, but this was the only thing which came to Jaime’s mind when Brienne paid him an unexpected visit in Riverrun.  _ Riverrun, you also saved me in Riverrun.  _

And then there was Cersei, following him like a ghost. Jaime was not sure anymore what he felt for her. What he had ever felt for her. In the many weeks he travelled from King’s Landing to Winterfell he did not miss her presence. _How could she betray the living and hope for death to prevail?_ After Cersei destroyed the Sept in an act worthy of the king Jaime had killed, she grew cold. _After Tommen killed himself because his own mother had murdered his wife._ Their relationship had not been the same since Cersei fought to have their brother sentenced to death, even though there was no indication Tyrion was anything but innocent. _Cersei would have left the real killer of our son unharmed, so she could murder our brother._ Jaime remembered Cersei’s satisfied face when the Mountain crushed the Prince of Dorne’s head. _Myrcella was his guest and Cersei did not care about the consequences until it was too late._

Enough now. Jaime pushed Cersei’s ghost away. He had to be back to his more immediate task of talking to Brienne, back to the tent in Riverrun.  _ Had the table not been between us, I would have run my hand over your cheek just to feel you.  _ Jaime remembered how he felt when Brienne wanted to hand Oathkeeper back to him. He felt hurt, had she not understood it was hers to keep?  _ So I am always with you.  _ He wanted to get into the boat with her, but had to stay with his army and carry out his mission.  _ Did I have to?  _

The decision to leave King’s Landing and ride North had been easier for Jaime than what he should do in this very moment. To fight the dead was a logical choice, alliances and dragon fire be damned. But that was not the only reason he had come. He knew he wanted to be with Brienne and thought of her often on the King’s Road. He wanted to fight for the living - together with her. He wanted to die beside her if this was to be the end of the world.  _ I would have died so you could live.  _

And yet, the end of the world had not come. As always, his little brother had been right and they had lived. And the living must deal with their feelings. Glancing at the now only half-filled flask, Jaime realised he had to stop drinking if the intention was to take this to Brienne as an invitation to talk. Having reached just the right amount of inebriation to venture into a foolhardy endeavour with his mind intact, he grabbed the flask, the cups and all the courage he could muster and walked into the direction of Brienne’s chambers. 

  
  
  
  
  
  



	4. Oathkeeper

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaime finds his way to Brienne's chamber

**_Brienne’s chamber -_ **

**\- BRIENNE-**

Brienne folded her clothes into a neat pile to put them on the chair she had designated for this task out of a lack of actual furniture. The chambers Lady Sansa had given her were ample, but not lavishly outfitted. Nothing was lavish in Winterfell, where everything was as sparse as the icy wasteland that lay before them, and any resources available were carefully put to use. Sometimes Brienne wondered where Lady Sansa stored her dresses. Not that she had many here. The Lady of the castle limited herself to as little decor as her social status allowed. Brienne’s thoughts turned to the Dragon Queen. She must have a whole room full of garments and a person to do her hair for an hour before anyone else took a glance at her. Was this how all noblewomen in Essos dressed? 

_ Essos, I could go to Essos and hide there for the rest of my life. Maybe the Dragon Queen would give me a position in Mereen.  _

What a stupid thought, Brienne pondered, but a welcome chance to escape from her reality. Her reality of being ridiculed, so others can have a quick laugh while she would think about it forever. 

Tyrion had fascinated her since the first time she saw him. A Lannister brother, on the side of Queen Daenerys, fighting his own sister. His stature showed no resemblance, but his hair and witty remarks left little doubt that he was Jaime’s brother. Brienne wondered why Tyrion would make his own brother the public subject of laughter. They had seemed so fond of each other the prior days. 

_ Gods, Jaime looked so embarrassed by Tyrion’s joke.  _

Brienne was more angry than hurt now. What did she have to do to be left in peace from such cruel jests, if not fight dead people? Could Tyrion not have made a joke about any other ridiculous feature of hers?  _ He knows exactly this will sting the most.  _ As a dwarf, he probably knew all of those cruel jokes all too well. Why play them on others?

There was a time when Brienne believed a man could have feelings for her, but this was long ago. She had painfully learnt that all a man could want from her were her island and her titles and her womb. She herself had loved before, but to say love was cruelly taken from her would be an exaggeration. It had always been one-sided. Her thoughts went to Renly, how she adored him and thanked him for rescuing her at the ball. She was devastated when the shadow took him. If not for Lady Catelyn, Brienne would have died in Renly’s camp, executed for killing her king by Loras Tyrell. 

But Lady Catelyn took her away from Renly only to give her Jaime.  _ Jaime. _ Brienne thought about the absurdity of it all. Lady Catelyn warned her about the notorious wickedness of the Kingslayer, but Jaime turned out to be so much more than that. In his twisted ways, he was a truer knight than anyone else she had ever met. In the course of a few days, he did more for her than anyone else ever would.  _ He lost his hand for me.  _

Brienne’s eyes wandered to the token which always reminded her of him. Heavy and masterfully crafted, elegant and adorned with the most precious gems Tywin could find. The sword she had named to honour their vow.  _ I carry it for you, Jaime. _ It was unique, its value far beyond anything she had ever hoped to own.

Back to more practical thoughts, Brienne mulled over whatever she should say to Jaime the following day. Maybe he would be knightly about it and just not mention Tyrion’s joke again?  _ I hope he just lets it go. _

Brienne’s mind was forced back to her chamber by a few gentle knocks on her door. Pondering for a moment whether or not to react, she decided she had to in case Lady Sansa needed her. Her legs felt as heavy walking to the door as her hand was reluctant to open it. 

Jaime was the last person she had expected to stand in front of her. Or rather, leaning against the wall, armed with more of the wine that made her feel warm inside and the world around her soft. 

**\- JAIME -**

Jaime hoped all the way along the maze of Winterfell’s hallways that he would spontaneously know the right thing to say. Something intelligent, yet charming. He usually did, but this time he had no eloquent words to put on his tongue. So he settled for “I brought us more to drink!”

After Jaime had stumbled his way into her chamber the look on Brienne’s face clearly spelled out what she thought: The last thing he needed was more to drink.

“More to drink?” Brienne closed the door. 

“This is Dornish. I did not know Lady Sansa had such a fine taste,” Jaime said in the most respectable voice he could demonstrate. 

“She does,” Brienne replied, with a questioning tone. 

Jaime set the flask on the nearest table he could find and filled the cups again, spilling some of it. He hoped this table was not valuable to her, since those stains would stay in the wood. Brienne took one of the cups for herself, possibly hoping this would trigger an explanation for what this strange appearance was about. Quietly, both of them took a sip. 

_ I should have talked to her this afternoon; I made this more difficult than it needed to be.  _

“Jaime, why have you come?” Brienne interrupted the silence. 

“To talk to you.”

“Jaime, there is no need for this...,” Brienne whispered, her eyes focusing on her cup. 

“But I feel there is…do you not think there is?” Jaime said gently and tilted his head to the side. “Look at me, Brienne.” 

As she returned his gaze, he could see tears in her eyes. Was she about to cry? He did not want her to cry now, his task at hand was already delicate enough. Jaime set his cup down on the table, the feeling of joyful inebriation had utterly left him. 

_ Please don’t cry, I do not know how to do this. _

“Brienne, I talked to my brother this afternoon. About many things. About family, about survival.” Jaime’s eyes remained focused on hers, the look his father had taught him to use in important discussions. “We also talked about you. About why you defended me against the Dragon Queen, about why I gave you the sword after our…journey.” Jaime hesitated for a few moments, but then continued, “I think both of us know the answer to why we did those things.” 

_ I should have known for a long time.  _

Brienne did not dare to speak, her mind obviously spinning around the words which had just been spoken, trying to think of different things they could mean. 

Jaime’s eyes wandered down to her hands still grasping her cup. A jolt ran through her body when he took the cup from her and put it on the table next to his. He then replaced the emptiness the cup had left between her hands with his own hand, patiently waiting while she gently folded her hands around his. 

_ Has she understood?  _

The moment Brienne exhaled and moved his hand so close to her chest he could feel her heartbeat, Jaime knew that she had understood. 

_ This went a lot better than expected.  _

**_\- BRIENNE -_ **

Jaime stepped closer, close enough to wrap his right arm around her waist and their faces almost touched. 

_ Is this really happening?  _

The anger and sadness had left Brienne in favour of bewilderment and nervousness. She was unsure what to say, or what to do. All she could think of were his words.  _ I think both of us know the answer to why we did those things _ . She did. But this was not the time to dwell on this and ask for details. She was too besotted from both his words and the wine. 

Jaime’s hand was still inside of hers, resting on her chest when she let go with one hand and put it on his face instead, cupping his cheek. He longingly looked at her before moving his body closer to hers. His lips barely touched hers, as if to ask for permission. Gently, she pressed back and let go of his hand, so she could put her arm around him, her other hand still resting on his cheek. She wanted to hold him like this, leaning her body against his. 

This was not among the possible outcomes she had expected of this evening.  _ How long has he known? _ Brienne had perceived a change in Jaime’s behavior since his arrival in Winterfell. He had been more courteous, not picking fights in  _ every _ conversation. He had specifically asked to fight under Brienne’s command.  _ He knighted me.  _ They had found the time to share a meal alone, without Pod or Tyrion, to tell each other what had happened in their lives in the many years which had passed since Joeffrey’s wedding. In Riverrun there had been no time to discuss such matters. During their meal, Jaime asked Brienne how her father was. Embarrassingly, she had been unable to provide an answer. Ravens were not sent for enjoyment in Winterfell and the last time she had received news from Tarth was almost a year ago. 

_ Forgive me, father.  _

Jaime’s now freed hand had wondered up to Brienne’s neck, while his lips had found their way to her jaw and further to the little space below her ear. This left Brienne with a tingling feeling on her skin and twirling in her belly, as if she were falling and Jaime’s arm around her waist kept her from hitting the ground. He paused to look her in the eyes with a solemn, but affectionate expression on his face, undoubtedly evaluating her sentiment on how to proceed. 

_ Do not stop now.  _

Brienne could not find any words which would adequately describe what she wanted, but her eyes seemed to have given a satisfying answer. Slowly, he put his hand on hers, which was still gently resting on his cheek. He tilted his head a little to the side and kissed her palm before grasping her hand and lowering it down to their hips, never taking his eyes off hers. This sudden loss of touch left her feeling anxious, as if something precious had been taken from her. Jaime lingered for a moment until his grip around her hand tightened, his other arm still wrapped around her waist. Brienne almost felt relieved when Jaime took a slow, deliberate step backwards, pulling her with him towards her bed. 

For a moment, Brienne was surprised at herself for her compliance in this situation. Her usual reaction to men closing in on her was to fight them off, but this was Jaime.  _ Jaime. _ Gladly, she followed the direction he had chosen for them, both with her body moving along with his, and with her soul feeling almost possessed by him. 

Once they reached their destination he removed his right arm from her waist, his left hand still gripping her right. Rather gracefully he sat down on the edge of her bed, gesturing with his eyes that she should to the same. 

_ He really wants to do this. _

  
  


**_\- JAIME -_ **

He had not planned to find himself sitting on Brienne’s bed, she beside him, holding hands and could not quite remember the exact sequence which had led them there. His plan had been to let her know that Tyrion had said the truth, find out how she felt about this, and ideally discuss what all of this meant the following day after a sobering night of sleep in their respective beds. 

Then life happened and his heart took control of whatever decision making he was still capable of after a night of fighting, a day of mourning and a feast of emotions. Whatever he had set in motion by his confession could not be halted anymore and neither of them seemed to try. 

Uncharacteristically daring, but typically resolute, Brienne moved her hands to the clasps on his jacket, undoing them one by one.  _ She knows what she wants. _ As he observed her in awe, Jaime pondered if he should untie Brienne’s shirt, but then decided to slip his hand under it to grasp her waist.  _ She is a lot softer than I thought. _ He was taken aback when Brienne rather unceremoniously stripped him of his jacket and promptly took off his shirt as well. 

Instead of continuing what she had started, Brienne’s eyes lingered on his body, her hands running from his chest to his shoulders, down his arms. When her hand reached the straps of his golden hand she stopped to find his eyes, asking for permission.  _ Why does she want to take it off?  _ Jaime gave a confused nod, and before he could further contemplate her motivations, she had undone the straps, removed the hand and carefully put it on the floor beneath them. His perplexed expression obviously had not escaped her because she proceeded to take his stump in both her hands and moved it to her chest. He could tell she was trying to say something which weighed heavily on her mind, but did not find the right words. Instead, her eyes found his and she ever so slightly nodded her head.  _ You do not need to thank me, I do not regret this.  _

Grateful for this gesture, the tension left Jaime when Brienne let go of his arm. He was still sitting beside her, his good hand on her waist beneath her shirt. Jaime slowly moved his hand upwards, indicating he wanted to strip her shirt off. Brienne came to his help, untying it herself and letting it slide off her shoulders. 

He marvelled at her sculpted body for a moment. Brienne had acquired several new scars since the last time he had seen her like this.  _ How much have I changed since then?  _ Jaime knew his days in Harrenhal were hardly his most glorious, but the years must have taken their toll. He knew they had added some wrinkles both from age and worry, and some grey hair.  _ She would not mind _ , he quickly consoled himself. 

Jaime put his hand back on Brienne’s neck as he leaned forward to kiss her again. Not as tentatively as before, there were no lingering doubts about her feelings on his mind, so he opened his mouth to caress her lower lip and let his tongue slide over her teeth. Surprised at first, Brienne intuitively understood how to respond. She put one hand on the back of his head, the other on his shoulder and then returned his move as her tongue met his. 

_ She is quite good at this.  _

Without giving it much thought, he left her embrace, the abrupt halt of affection visibly worrying her. Jaime gave her a little smile of reassurance before reaching down to remove his boots and breeches to prevent further interruptions. As expected, it took him an embarrassingly long time to get out of his attire.  _ I should be better at this by now. _ Aware of his intentions, Brienne did the same and then, without further gestures or words, moved up on her bed until she was half-sitting, half-lying on her pillows. Jaime moved next to her, both now lying sideways and facing each other, naked. Brienne’s eyes met his with a mixture of expectation and unease, which Jaime prudently noted. Gently, he put his left arm around her to stroke her back in calming circles. 

_ If you want to say something to her, now would probably be a good time.  _

Jaime put up his most trustworthy face, but not without adding a little grin. “I am perfectly content to just lay beside you until dawn.” He paused. “However, I would also not waste a perfectly good opportunity to get to know you better.” 

Brienne smiled for the first time since he entered her chamber, “Nothing is wasted in Winterfell.” 

His phrase did not sound quite as smooth as it had in his mind. It still reached its goal of letting Brienne know that whatever was to follow was her choice. Satisfied with her reply, Jaime pulled her close until their bodies touched and gave her another deep kiss, which she willingly reciprocated. They had seen each other naked before and he had felt her skin on his, but this was very different. As tightly pressed together as they were, Brienne could undoubtedly feel how hard he had gotten, but it did not seem to disturb her.  _ Has she seen other men like this before? _ She continued to kiss him and wrapped her arms around his waist and neck to draw him even closer.  _ She is so strong and gentle.  _

Motivated by her affirming embrace, Jaime decided to make a daring move and slid his good hand from her back to her hips and in between her legs. He grinned as she let out a startled gasp, letting his hand slide even further until he could feel how wet she was.  _ She wants to be with me.  _ He continued to caress her, moving his fingers in small circles. Brienne had stopped kissing him and lay perfectly still, breathing steadily as Jaime pleasured her. It was difficult for him to tell whether he could make her come like this. She was so quiet and had her eyes closed, yet looked like she was having the best dream of her life.  _ I really know nothing about women, bloody hell. _ Since she clearly enjoyed it, Jaime concluded she would be happy in any case. He briefly contemplated if he should ask her what she liked, but then decided this kind of talk would be best reserved for another time. 

When Brienne started kissing him again and had opened her eyes, Jaime sensed she was ready now.  _ Thank the gods, I cannot wait much longer.  _ He took his hand off her and carefully moved on top of her, arranging his position. Resting on his lower arms, her hands on his shoulders, Jaime looked at her until she gave him a little nod and smile. He countered with a satisfied grin that reached his eyes and gave her another kiss, as he entered her as slowly as he could.  _ Thank you for letting me do this.  _ Once he was fully sheathed in her, he paused to search her face for any discomfort or fear, but only found her smile and observant eyes. He kissed her again when he started moving, and felt how Brienne lowered her hands and slid them down along his back, squeezing him tightly towards her.  _ This is intense.  _ Jaime knew he could not do this for very long as Brienne softly started moaning, pressing her legs around his waist.  _ Thank the gods she has no reference for how long this should take.  _ Jaime wanted to be as gallantly and selfless as possible, letting her have him until she no longer wanted, but the exhaustion of the last few days and the wine had depleted his self-control. He let out a muted groan into her neck, spilling inside her, immediately hoping she would forgive him for his lack of restraint. 

After a few moments, Jaime gently rolled off her and tucked his head into her neck, one leg lazily spread across her, his good hand resting on her chest.  _ Does her silence mean she is happy?  _ As he dared to glance up to her face, she tilted her head towards him to kiss his forehead, making a soft humming sound.  _ She is happy.  _ Content with himself and the world, he drifted off to sleep. 

  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is my interpretation of post-feast events. I thought about this for a very long time and concluded they'd behave like that, given that both of them don't know what they're doing, but they're adults with life experience :-)


	5. Love & Duty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Waking up in the cold of Winterfell: slight social awkwardness and not everything is bliss

**_Brienne’s chambers -_ **

**\- BRIENNE -**

Winterfell was cold and quiet in the early morning hours after the feast. Most people were still sleeping; even the servants who had been given a day of leave. The fire in her chamber had extinguished, a faint glow still simmering in the ashes. _If I quickly put in another log, it might fan the flame again._

Brienne felt quite warm under her furs and was most unwilling to leave her nest and wake Jaime, who was still sleeping on his side, facing her, curled up as a small child would. Brienne had seen him sleep before many times when she took him to King’s Landing, but never so peacefully. She found his steady breathing soothing and had an urge to run her fingers through his hair, down his neck. _No, this would wake him._

She had never woken up besides a man in a situation like this and wondered what the proper etiquette was for such an occasion. There was certainly no official etiquette for what an unwed noblewoman was supposed to do after waking up next to a naked man. Maybe there was an unofficial protocol? Was the normal proceeding for one of them to quietly leave in the hope that nobody had noticed their nightly encounter? Brienne pondered. Did she care if anyone had noticed? 

A part of her cared, the words of her cruel septa ringing in her ears. _Unwed women who give themselves to men are whores and deserve to be banished from their family._ Brienne searched her heart for feelings of shame or regret, but could not find any. She certainly did not feel like a whore. She would not have done this with anyone else and could not bring herself to see the wrongness or wantonness in it. _Other people certainly would. Your father would._

Her father. How would he react if he heard rumours that his daughter, his only heir, was now not only infamous for wielding a sword, but for taking a lover? _A lover._ And not any lover, it _had_ to be the equally infamous Kingslayer. 

_Yes, it had to be him._

Brienne concluded that the Lords and Ladies of Westeros would not grant her any mitigating factors such as having survived an army of literal death. Her father however, might be more understanding and at least listen to her reasons. 

Lady Sansa. Would she have to tell Lady Sansa? _Tell her what exactly?_ Brienne felt the unease creeping up in her throat. This was a more difficult situation than she was prepared to cope with. Jaime had come to her chamber to confess that Tyrion had not played a joke on her, but for what purpose? 

Brienne, for the first time, contemplated the implied meaning of Jaime’s words. She knew him well enough to know he would not tell her all of this to have her for one night and then make a quick retreat. She also knew far too much remained unspoken between them -houses, alliances, oaths- to seriously contemplate a union. 

_Maybe he has not thought it through and now regrets it._

Jaime breathed in deeply and slowly opened his eyes, Brienne’s erratic movements must have woken him and stirred his warrior’s reflexes. Brienne could detect those few moments of disorientation in his eyes - where was he, how did he get here? Relief flowed through her like warm water down an icy drain when Jaime seemed to have reconstructed past night’s events and settled for a content smile instead of an expression of terror, putting his arm around her. 

“It’s bloody cold in here, why does Winterfell have to be so damn cold?”

**\- JAIME -**

“I fucking hate the North,” Jaime mumbled, “it is fucking cold and full of stinking Wildlings.” 

Granted, Brienne’s room was warmer than Tyrion’s, who never bothered to keep a fire going because he spent most days in meetings anyways. Despite a slightly more acceptable room temperature, Jaime could still feel the cold through the sheets and furs, transported inside his body with the air he breathed into his lungs. 

“Come here, warm me,” he turned to Brienne as he pulled her closer until their bodies were entangled.  _ Better. _

“I wanted to put another log on the fire, but did not want to wake you,” Brienne replied helplessly. 

“It is fine, you will have to warm me then.”

It was not really fine, but Brienne’s body felt better than a log in the fire. Jaime remembered his chambers in King’s Landing, outfitted with carpets, cushions and a cozy fire the servants dutifully kept going.  _ Does Brienne have a servant here to help her?  _ Of course Jaime knew a world outside of luxury, a world of army camps in cold, wet mud. Winterfell had a different kind of cold to it though, one that stayed in your body long after you warmed yourself near a fireplace. It did have nice baths though.  _ Maybe she wants to go there with me today?  _

Accepting the icy breeze of Winterfell, Jaime’s thoughts turned to the present situation of him being in Brienne’s bed, naked, slightly hungover.  _ Fuck, I should have said something nice to her.  _

“Did you sleep well?”

“Uhm, yes, I think so?”

“Do you have servants to keep your fire going, help you with your household?” 

“A maid comes around noon when I am gone to take care of the fire and my laundry. The other times, I do it myself, since I do not need any servants.” 

“Of course you do not perish without them, but they are bloody helpful. On the road here I almost froze to death because it took me an hour to make a fire in my camp with only one hand.” 

She chuckled at the thought of this. 

“What is so amusing about this, do you wish me to freeze to death in the wilderness?” Jaime teased. 

“Of course I do not. I am simply surprised that you did not sleep in inns.”

“That was too dangerous, my dear lady. My sister branded me a traitor for sure after how we parted. Anyone would be happy to capture me and return me to her.”

There were moments of silence between them.  _ Cersei.  _

“How did you part?” Brienne almost whispered. 

Jaime cursed himself for having started this conversation, but at the same time recognised the need for it. 

“Not on good terms. She almost commanded the Mountain to take my head off.”

“Was she being serious?”

Jaime pondered on this for a while.  _ Does Cersei want me dead?  _

“I do not know. Maybe. Probably not, but in moments of anger she is capable of many things.” 

_ Such as blowing up a Sept.  _

“So you will not go back to King’s Landing?” 

The implicit question did not escape Jaime. They had been successfully talking around the central issue of what Jaime’s presence in Brienne’s bed implied, but there was no use in pretending it did not exist. Jaime did not have to explain the inherent difficulty of the situation to Brienne, she was not quite as young and innocent as when he first met her. She had experienced the world and knew that past sins and family names were tough to escape from. Jaime also knew, however, that he surely had to clarify his ulterior motivations to her. 

“Brienne, I do not intend to go back to Cersei. I already decided that when I was on the road to Winterfell.” 

_ That was a bit direct. _

He exhaled. “My relationship with her has been difficult for a long time. We were born together, raised together. For a long time I believed we were not completely separate persons. The thought of leaving her never seriously entered my mind. I did everything for her.”  _ Everything indeed _ . “But then many tragedies happened in our lives and I was affected by them in a certain way, whereas she was not. Her worst qualities were amplified by them and I could not put a stop to it.” 

Brienne was stroking his arm, patiently watching him in silence.  _ Is she horrified by all of this?  _

“I stayed with her for so long because I thought she was my family and I could not abandon her.” Jaime paused, thinking about his other family member. “Then one day, Tyrion came to me in secret to suggest meeting the Dragon Queen and Lord Snow because of an existential threat to every living being.” 

Jaime took a few moments to think about what he had just said, absentmindedly massaging Brienne’s back with his good hand. 

“When I saw the dead man attacking us in the Dragon Pit, I did not care about wars between houses anymore. When Cersei agreed to send our army North I thought she felt the same. And then she bluntly told me she never had any intention of fighting for the living. She welcomed death to destroy her enemies and millions of innocent people along with them. She even laughed at me for being stupid enough to think she would do anything else. That is when I realised that Cersei was beyond help.” 

Jaime made a long, thoughtful pause, but Brienne knew not to interrupt him now. In the six weeks on the road to Winterfell, he had plenty of time to think about all of this, but speaking it out to another person was a different matter entirely. It made it  _ real _ . 

“Then there is the war with Daenerys. She has no reason to show mercy when she takes over the city after this kind of betrayal. The knowledge that Cersei is in King’s Landing, soon facing the Dragon Queen, and I am here not supporting my own sister is not easy for me. I do know however that Cersei cannot remain Queen if there is ever to be peace. I also know she will not be persuaded to surrender by anyone, not by me, not by dragons, because reason has utterly left her. So I cannot fight for her anymore, cannot fight for my sister. I also cannot fight for my brother, whose Queen is not exactly fond of me. So I try to stay out of it all.” 

Brienne was visibly shaken by this confession, had not expected those words.  _ Should she not be pleased by this?  _

“Jaime, I am sorry you had to go through all of this. I do not pretend to understand your relationship with your sister. I am not sure I ever will. But I want you to know that I accept it because you are more than that,” Brienne was looking for words, “and I hope you will be able to fully reconcile with your brother despite all that has happened because he is your family too and he is a good man like you.” 

Jaime did not know how to react to this. He had expected many things: accusations, disgust, disbelief, but not really this. He was glad that Brienne did not press the issue of Cersei, at least for now. 

_ Until she finds out about the pregnancy. _

Jaime considered telling her about Cersei’s pregnancy now as well, but did not want to completely sour this morning for Brienne, so refrained from telling her.  _ What does it change, anyways? Neither Cersei, nor Daenerys will act differently because of it. Since Cersei lied about everything else too it’s Euron’s fucking bastard for all I know. _

“Brienne, I appreciate your sentiment, I really do. I have to be honest with you, however.” 

A look of fear appeared on Brienne’s face, so Jaime pulled her closer and kissed her forehead before looking her in the eyes again. 

“When I came to your chamber yesterday, I wanted to say so many things, but told you only the essence of it. Everything I said, and did, was an honest expression of how I feel for you, but I do not truly know how to proceed with this.” 

Brienne continued to stare at him with fear, now mingled with confusion, in her eyes.  _ I do not want to hurt you.  _

“I wish that this could somehow work,, I mean  _ us _ . But I do not know how. I…,” Jaime was trying to find the perfect way to speak his mind _ ,  _ “I do not know how it is to have a life with a normal woman, any kind of life. It is a thing I have never thought about, never considered as an option. I do not know if I am capable of that, even if I want to.”  _ I hope you understand. _

Brienne took a minute to collect her thoughts until she finally spoke, quietly. “I know. I believe I know better than you think. Although this kind of life was the option I had once preferred, it did not seem likely to happen. So I chose a different path.” 

The sadness Jaime had seen before returned to Brienne’s eyes. Her mind was now in the distant past. “This happened so long ago, I am not entirely sure what it was that I had wanted. A family, companionship? I am not certain anymore. But I know I do not wish to give up everything I have now and I also do not know what I can offer. I never had to think about this, not since a long time ago anyways.” 

Again, Brienne had managed to surprise Jaime with her reply.  _ I had forgotten about those things, it must have been difficult for you.  _

Jaime made it his task to steer the conversation back to a more hopeful mood with his usual grin. “Well, it seems like two misfits have found each other.”

Brienne chuckled at that, both from amusement and facing the bitter truth. 

Jaime continued, now with more seriousness. “How about we do not consider such difficult things for now and see how things are between us while I am here?” 

“I would like that,” Brienne seemed relieved at being presented with a viable option which did not require difficult choices, at least for now. 

“After all, maybe the Dragon Queen does want my head in the end and there is no use for long term plans,” Jaime laughed sarcastically, “and if Daenerys loses, Cersei will be more than happy to finish that task.” 

Brienne looked shocked. 

_ Oh.  _

“Brienne, it must have crossed your mind that Daenerys is not my friend. She relents for now to keep the peace, but I do not believe she has forgotten me. And Cersei already threatened to collect my head, which I just told you.” 

_ She will also want yours if she ever finds out about us. I need to discuss this with Tyrion. _

“But you came here to fight with her against the dead. The truth about her father cannot have escaped her entirely!”

“Brienne, she burned the Tarleys for not bending the knee without giving it a second thought. She has had years to think about what to do with me. I do have hope that Jon Snow will appeal to her reason, and my brother will do his bit, but I do not fully trust the Dragon Queen.” 

Brienne seemed to share his feelings.  _ You know Sansa has doubts, too.  _

“And then there is the inconvenient matter of me being a Lannister, the most hated house in Westeros. This will never go away. And anything Cersei does in the upcoming war will reflect on me.”

Brienne sighed, thoughts rumbling in her head. “The people of the North are now positively disposed towards you now.”

Jaime nodded, raising his eyebrows.  _ Where was this going?  _

Brienne continued. “You are as far away from Cersei as possible without leaving Westeros. If this stays so until the war is over, maybe people will not blame you for her actions. Lady Sansa would surely let you stay here as her guest.”

Jaime was taken by surprise by this suggestion.  _ A guest of the Starks, really?  _

“You mean I should stay here until Cersei is either defeated or she prevails and the two of us have to flee to the far corners of Essos?” He chuckled.  _ At least Essos is warmer than fucking Winterfell and the Dothraki stink less than the Wildlings.  _

“Well, what was your plan? Freezing to death in the wilderness?” Brienne laughed now, amused by his sad lack of options. 

“I thought Tyrion might have an idea or two,” Jaime laughed now as well, “but fine, if Lady Stark will have me, I will wait out the war here until a raven informs me who has won and will take my head off.”

“Do not say that,” Brienne said with a serious voice. “And I shall speak with Lady Sansa.” 


	6. Confessions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Synopsis: Brienne asks Lady Sansa for her permission to let Jaime stay

**_-Lady Sansa’s chambers -_ **

**\- BRIENNE -**

Lady Sansa’s chambers were the largest in the castle. Lord Snow had no interest in such luxuries, being used to the life of a Brother of the Night’s Watch. Brienne knew that Lord Eddard and Lady Catelyn Stark had occupied Sansa’s quarters until this mindless brute, Ramsay Bolton. Armed with the memories of the preceding night, Brienne internally shuddered at the thought of him.  _ How could Lady Sansa endure all of this? Would I be strong like her, or break? _

“Lady Brienne, you are early today,” Lady Sansa remarked in a rather cheerful voice, sitting amidst countless raven scrolls and ledgers.  _ Undoubtedly taking account of the stocks. _

The Lady of Winterfell usually displayed a distant, cold demeanour, but had grown very fond of Brienne. She treated her knight more like a member of her family than a servant. Ever since the fateful day Brienne caught up with Sansa and Theon in the forest, she had become her closest confident, especially since Arya showed no extended interest in politics or the daily business of their castle.

“Am I interrupting?” Brienne sought assurance that there indeed was time to discuss her peculiar private matter. 

“No, please, sit. I was just going over the supplies we have left. The presence of the Essosi armies has quite depleted them, but we should be fine for the Winter.” 

_ Because so many have perished.  _

Brienne did not want to drag out the inevitable. Sansa had already sensed that there was more to discuss than stocks of grain and crumbling castle walls.

“My Lady, I have come with a rather unusual request. It will sound strange at first, but please let me explain before you come to a decision.” 

“Now I am intrigued, Brienne! What is it?” Sansa seemed to welcome the prospect of a new topic of discussion, thankful that her mind was presented with a distraction from all her worries. 

“It is about Ser Jaime.” 

“Ser Jaime?” Sansa was notably surprised. 

_ The one you fought for you.  _

“Yes. As you already know from his…interrogation, I have known him for quite some time and he has tried to protect you ever since he had sworn an oath to your mother.” 

“Yes, you told me as much,” Sansa was quiet, undoubtedly being visited by memories of Lady Catelyn. 

“Ser Jaime had promised to fight for the living and that is what he did.” 

“Yes, and I am most grateful for it. I have to admit I did not fully believe in his intentions at first, but it seems he was true to his words. Quite unusual for a Lannister.” 

_ Nothing in my life has prepared me for this.  _

Brienne did not know how to continue, so she tried to express it with a territory she was more familiar with. “My Lady, there are certain experiences in life, which forever shape the relationship you have with a person. Ser Jaime and I have had many such moments. On our journey your mother sent us. When he sent me to protect you. And now here in Winterfell, facing death, standing side by side. Those moments change the perspective you have of a person and on your own life.” 

Sansa seemed calm, but keen on hearing more. 

_ Essos, we can go to Essos.  _

“Ser Jaime and I have come to an understanding that we do not wish to be separated again. However, we are also not entirely sure what kind of life is possible for us in the long-term given the…political circumstances. However, for the time being, we thought it might be best if Ser Jaime stayed here in Winterfell until the war is over and we could consider future arrangements.” 

Sansa visibly struggled to keep her composure and started walking towards her window to look outside. Brienne had never seen this look on Sansa’s face before and was not sure how to read it. Was she shocked, angry, about to call her guards? 

_ Please say something. _

After many agonising moments, Sansa finally turned around with a little smile on her face and spoke. “Brienne, are you telling me that you and Jaime Lannister, the Lion of Casterly Rock, are romantically involved and you want me to allow the lion to stay in the wolf’s den?” 

_ Gods, the Lion of Casterly Rock.  _

“That would accurately describe the situation,” Brienne tried to remain professional, but could feel the heat rising up inside her. 

Sansa shook her head and laughed to herself. “The Lannister brothers never disappoint. I never had the chance to personally meet Ser Jaime in King’s Landing, but Tyrion often spoke of him rather fondly.” 

_ Not of his sister, I presume.  _

“But you have to tell me,” Sansa added with a suddenly stern look on her face, “what about Cersei?”

Those words came like a dagger, but Brienne had anticipated the question. Sansa had more reason than anyone else left alive to hate Cersei and undoubtedly knew about Jaime’s relationship with her. About how he had supported his sister for many years, about their children. 

“They did not part on good terms, my Lady. They have not been on good terms for quite some time and Ser Jaime does not believe she should be Queen. For his family’s sake, for the people’s sake.” Brienne hoped this answer would satisfy Sansa. 

Sansa was brooding for a few moments, pacing around her chamber. “I have no immediate reason not to believe in Ser Jaime’s intentions. I never saw him hurt innocent people like his sister did, or Joeffrey. Joeffrey hated him. Tyrion trusts him. You more than trust him. War changes people.” 

Sansa said this last sentence with much deliberation. It carried more meaning than Jaime’s motivations. Lady Sansa was obviously quite preoccupied with her brother Jon’s relationship with the Dragon Queen and what this would mean for the North. 

“I will allow Ser Jaime to stay for as long as both of you wish. He is my guest,” Sansa said determined and reassuring. 

_ Thank the seven. _

“Thank you, my Lady. I promise we will try not to cause too much disturbance. We know the people around here do not fully trust the Lannisters, even if they have fought with them.”

Brienne had no adequate words to express her gratitude. She was not only grateful for Jaime’s sake, but also because Sansa had come to trust her so much that she would let her enemy’s brother stay as a guest even though she had little reason to like him. 

Brienne was also thankful that Sansa did not bother to ask about proposals of marriage. Her Lady had no need for an explanation that the situation was too difficult to make such decisions right now. Brienne also knew that Sansa had come to think of it as extremely unwise to marry a man one did not thoroughly know.  _ A man like Ramsay.  _

“I presume he will live in your chambers? We are quite limited in space with all the wounded.” Lady Sansa had switched to a matter-of-factly voice and expression. 

Brienne was slightly shocked at the boldness of this question and what it implied. She was also shocked that she had not even thought about it in advance. “As soon as Lord Tyrion leaves, Jaime, I mean Ser Jaime will have to vacate his chambers,” Brienne replied, knowing it did not really answer Sansa’s question, but gave her the option of answering it herself. 

“So he will stay with you then,” Sansa decided, knowing full well the scandalous discussions this might cause around Winterfell and beyond. Sansa was practical, however, and had little care left for gossip and what people thought was appropriate and what not, for she had other priorities. 

“But Brienne,” Sansa added with the faintest smile, “if he ever mistreats you, I will feed him to the hounds.”


	7. War Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Synopsis: Jaime invites himself to Daenerys’ war meeting

**_\- Winterfell meeting room -_ **

**\- JAIME -**

Jaime strode through Winterfell’s hallway maze, this time rather briskly, furious at his brother. 

_ Bloody fucking hell, you idiot.  _

Having overheard a discussion between the Master of Arms and some page boy, Jaime knew that in this very moment the Dragon Queen and Jon Snow would be deciding the fate of King’s Landing. 

Jaime had known this moment would come and had told his brother he wanted to be part of it. Jaime had also assumed that Daenerys Targaryan and Jon Snow wanted him to be part of it. After all, who would be arrogant enough to plan an attack on the capital without consulting the man who had planned its defences for the past 20 years when he was right in front of them? 

Daenerys Targaryan and Jon Snow, apparently were arrogant enough.  _ Cersei would also not consult anyone except for Qyburn, and she would let me rot in a dungeon instead.  _

Jaime had already warned Tyrion about Cersei’s new defences, that the city could not be taken after a quick siege. Of course his brother’s queen had her dragons and thought everybody would lay down their arms when she demonstrated their mighty flames. 

_ She will undoubtedly demonstrate them on innocent people who do not give a fuck who sits on the throne.  _

Tyrion had promised to tell Jaime when the meeting would take place, but after an apparent change in schedule the news had not found his way to him. So now the one-pawed lion tried to find his way to his destination through the maze of Winterfell, cursing the architect of this monstrosity. 

Finally, he found the correct door and burst through without knocking. Lord Snow had just been making a remark to Ser Davos. “Once the ships have arrived on Dragonstone, we can arrange to meet…Ser Jaime?” 

Jaime gave Tyrion an accusing stare before he turned to Jon Snow with his typical snide grin. “Forgive me, I am quite late. I could not find my way.” 

The war room was filled with the people who would plan the attack on King’s Landing to take the throne from Cersei. There were Daenerys and Jon Snow, of course, sitting at the head of the table.  _ As father always did.  _ Daenerys looked regal as usual, clad in a white dress with a crimson scarf, her hair in elaborate braids. She reminded Jaime of Prince Rhaegar. Jon Snow could not care less about such finery and looked more like a brother of the Night’s Watch than a lord apart from the few garments Lady Sansa had made for him, a coat and a belt with a wolf’s head stitched on it. Next to Daenerys was Tyrion, beside him neatly lined up the leader of the Unsullied and a Dothraki. Next to Jon Snow were Ser Davos and several Northern lords Jaime could not identify. 

Of course he had not been officially invited, but Jaime assumed if he pretended that he had been, nobody would pick up on it. 

The Dragon Queen quickly did. “Ser Jaime, thank you for coming. We will be making our plans without your service today. We have all the information we need.” 

“Oh, do you?” Jaime was not afraid of the white-haired beauty who had killed more men in a second than anyone else he had ever seen. 

_ Except for Cersei and her wildfire.  _

Daenerys remained calm, but the leader of the Unsullied glanced toward Jaime with his piercing eyes, the message clear. The Dothraki bloodrider had obviously not understood the situation and remained quiet. 

_ At least someone knows when to hold their tongue.  _

“Please forgive me for my direct words,  _ your Grace.  _ The last time I saw your strategic planning in action you made a rather pitiful display invading an abandoned Casterly Rock, were embarrassingly ambushed by Euron Greyjoy, a second rate pirate who destroyed half your fleet at minimum, and lost Highgarden to a cunning cripple. And now you believe you should make an attempt to take King’s Landing without consulting the man who knows more about its defences and its current ruler than anyone else?” Jaime was trying his best to not let the Golden Lion out on the danger of encountering the Red Dragon. 

_ From how far away can she command the dragons to come?  _

Daenerys’ expression had changed to an icy mask only Lady Sansa could rival. “As far as I remember we met on that day, Ser Jaime. You charged at Drogon bravely, I will grant you this, a lack of courage is not one of your many sins. Too much foolhardiness, perhaps. Your men were no match for me, however.” 

“You mean the Tarley men you so bravely burnt? And yes, they were no match for your dragon. Is this how you plan to take King’s Landing, by burning it down until no resistance is left?” 

Everybody was silent now. Jaime could not fully read their expressions - Jon Snow looked worried, as did Ser Davos. The Northern lords were fully occupied with conspiring against the Kingslayer, no doubt. The Dragon Queen remained like a statue. 

Jaime had calmed down enough to start again. Possibly he had hit a nerve with Lord Snow. “Please, at least listen to me. Your Grace, you have experience with taking cities full of slaves who readily welcome you into their arms as their saviour. I admire you for this, but this will not happen in Westeros.” 

Daenerys exhaled sharply, Jaime sensed she already knew what he was talking about.  _ Of course she knows, they dislike her even more than me.  _

“The citizens of King’s Landing do not remember the Targaryans fondly. They will be afraid of you and your dragons, terrified even. Nobody will welcome you and my dearest sister will undoubtedly have more surprises for you in stock than you currently assume. A lack of dragons is not a lack of strategic opportunity. Defending a city is much easier than taking it.” 

The Dragon Queen was now listening, but remained dismissive. “And what surprises could she possibly have, Ser Jaime? More pirates? I have seen the weapon which injured Drogon, I now know how to avoid its arrows.” 

_ Who is the foolhardy one of us? _

“Tyrion, tell them. I mean, REALLY tell them,” Jaime hissed at his brother. 

“Your Grace,” Tyrion rose from his seat, “Cersei has had plenty of time to prepare her defences for a long siege. My brother is correct, she will have surprises. Her Hand, Qyburn, will have engineered more scorpions and possibly restocked the wildfire I already told you about which destroyed Stannis’ whole fleet.” 

Jaime knew the  _ I already told you  _ was a message to him, implying that talking to Daenerys was rather useless once her mind had been made up. 

“Then what is your suggestion, Ser Jaime?” Daenerys surprisingly wanted to hear more, perhaps only to dismiss it. 

Jaime took a deep breath, his lips a thin line. “The Lannister army are my men, my generals. Cersei has demonstrated her cruelty more than once, many people died in the…Sept. They will listen to me. Let me into the city before you attack, so I can convince them to lay down their arms. Euron and the Golden Company can be dealt with.”

“Will you be as successful as in convincing your sister to fight for the living?” 

_ Cersei is insane, my generals are not. _

“This is different. I fought with those men for years, they have always,  _ always  _ followed my orders. They did so in the face of certain death, they know me to be reasonable. They know I care about their lives. They trust me.”

“This is ridiculous,” Daenerys fumed, rolling her eyes. “You want me to let you, the man who killed my father and brother of my greatest enemy, into the city I want to take? I assume so you can tell them all about my plans and the state of my forces? Is this why you came here, as a spy?” 

Jaime was furious at this suggestion. “As you hopefully remember, I fought here in Winterfell just as you did. I was ready to die for the living! I have given you no reason to distrust me, on the contrary.” 

Jon Snow’s lack of response made Jaime anxious.  _ He is the Warden of the North, he should say something to counter her. It is obvious he thinks I am right.  _

Jaime continued his roar. “Besides, if you truly believe Cersei has no other ways of finding out the exact state of your forces you are mistaken, your Grace. How long do you think is the road to King’s Landing from Winterfell? All Cersei needs are a few soldiers disguised as farmers who carefully count every single man, horse and dragon you have and you will have no way of preventing this. Fishing boats will do the same if you take your ships to Dragonstone. Cersei will know who or what is coming for her, with or without me. Or do you plan to burn everyone on your way?” 

This must have stung, everybody was silent. 

“Your Grace,” Jon Snow was now resolved to at least voice his opinion, his expression emotionless as always, “maybe we should reconsider our plans. Ser Jaime is correct that Cersei will know the state of our forces. It is also true that an army listens to their commander when he is reasonable, so maybe a surrender from within is the best option we have to avoid bloodshed.” 

_ Oh, so you can speak after all?  _

Daenerys now blessed Jon Snow with a stare which probably also announces dragon fire. 

Trying to salvage the situation, Tyrion quickly came to help. “Your Grace, perhaps Brandon Stark could be of assistance. He can fly his ravens to King’s Landing and find out more about Cersei’s defences as well as Euron’s fleet.”

“Yes, let him do this,” Daenerys at last agreed with something, “but I will hear no more of these clever Lannister schemes,” directing her stare at Tyrion. “You are to stay here in Winterfell, Ser Jaime, and stay out of  _ my _ war. If you are compliant, maybe you will live to see the world I am going to build.” 


	8. Departure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Synopsis: the united forces of Dany and Jon prepare to leave Winterfell

**_\- on the Walls of Winterfell -_ **

**\- BRIENNE -**

Brienne stood on the castle walls, the barren landscape before her. In the absence of a clear threat she had stopped wearing her armour every time she left her room, a request by Lady Sansa who wanted her to be more of an advisor than a protector.  _ To force me to take part in long discussions about alliances, and marriages, and stocks, and farming _ . She had tried to avoid this, but of course keeping out of strategic issues was not a long-term option, even as a knight. Especially as a knight. If she ever wanted to be responsible for Tarth, Brienne had to start being more involved with strategic matters. When she told Jaime about this he was bemused and immediately sided with Lady Sansa.  _ You will be a formidable leader because you are wise and kind and brave,  _ his words echoed in Brienne’s ears and she knew he had meant them without a hint of his usual sarcasm. 

So a new attire it was. Brienne quite liked the design of Lady Arya’s garments, they were practical for a swift fighter and had something similar made. It had a different cape more suitable for broadsword fighting, like Jaime’s cloak, which now flowed elegantly around her shoulders. And the cape was dark blue of course, Jaime had vehemently insisted, the seamstress had to search the entire castle for half a day until she found such cloth. Oathkeeper remained buckled to her waist, the one token she would never leave her room without. Brienne quietly admitted to herself that she quite liked the new outfit despite her initial protests. 

Decimated by the army of the dead, Daenerys’ forces where still impressive. The Unsullied stood in rank and file, seemingly unfazed by the terrors they had witnessed. Brienne had heard stories about them, how 2000 Unsullied defied 50.000 Dothraki until the savage riders cut off their braids in shame and rode home to the vast Dothraki sea. They say the Unsullied had no feelings, no fear, but Brienne did not believe this to be true. She had seen their leader several times with the Dragon Queen’s advisor, a beautiful and kind woman with luscious dark curls. Their gestures and eyes conveyed their feelings to the world. There was nothing soulless about this man. He was consumed by affection for her. 

_ He loves her and she loves him.  _

The Dothraki did not seem to have brought any women with them.  _ Do Dothraki women know how to fight?  _ Most of the riders had perished. Brienne wondered what would become of their families they had left behind in Essos. 

The Northern armies had not suffered as much, but were arguably not as battle-hardened and well-trained as the soldiers the Dragon Queen had brought with her. They would follow Lord Snow into any battle, but they were tired, hungry, and many of them sick. Brienne worried.  _ Lady Sansa knows many of them, many who will not return.  _

And then there were the dragons. They alone could win a war with a good rider, even without their fire, by inspiring so much fear that any army would surrender. Now Rhaegal had his own capable rider, but the beast had been injured.  _ Will Daenerys let him rest?  _

“Do you want to ride them?” A familiar voice interrupted Brienne in her thoughts. Jaime had appeared on the wall, undoubtedly looking for Brienne to pick her up for their evening meal. He had been in a bad mood since he entered Queen Daenerys’ battle preparations uninvited und was thornily rebuffed. He tried to put up a smile for Brienne and glanced at the circling dragons above them.

“To be honest, not for fighting. I prefer to look my opponent in the eyes. Do you?” 

“Of course I would ride them!” Jaime marvelled at the beasts, “when we were small, Tyrion and I often told each other stories about dragons. I know all about them, I know of Meraxes and Vhaghar. That one bit another dragon’s head off! She was injured in the Battle above the Gods Eye by Caraxes and then drowned in the lake.” 

_ Gods, he really is enthused by this.  _

“She?”

“They called her a she, maybe she was a Lady Dragon,” Jaime smirked charmingly.

Jaime’s expression became concerned and contemplative as he viewed the gathering forces outside of Winterfell. “Do you know when they leave?” 

Brienne had agreed with Lady Sansa that she was allowed to inform Jaime about everything she knew from their meetings unless she had explicitly been told not to. So far, Lady Sansa had never made this exclusion. Practical as always, the Lady of Winterfell knew this arrangement could only work if there were not too many secrets between the three of them. 

“Tomorrow morning, as far as I am informed. Daenerys will ride Drogon to Dragonstone and take the Unsullied with her. It is my understanding that she has supplies stocked on her island. Lord Snow will ride Rhaegal and take the Dothraki and the Northern forces down the King’s Road.” 

“And my brother will accompany Jon Snow. He has informed me of that,” Jaime added, shaking his head. “The Dragon Queen has no trust in Lord Snow, so she sent a spy.” 

“You do not know that, maybe she thinks Tyrion can help Jon Snow.”

Jaime lovingly looked at Brienne with a slight smile, tilting his head. 

“You think I am too naive again? I am not a complete fool, you know,” Brienne was a bit insulted by the implied meaning of his expression. 

_ I have successfully survived quite a long time without you.  _

“You know I think of you as very capable. But you always want to see the good in people. So you choose to believe that my brother is on a mission to assist Lord Snow rather than to extract information,” Jaime was not teasing this time, he tried to calmly explain his concerns to her. “I was at the meeting, Brienne. The Dragon Queen does not trust or listen to anyone. Not Tyrion, not me, not Jon Snow.” 

Brienne of course knew he was right about this. It was obvious to anyone with reasonable eyesight. But if anyone could do something about it, it was Tyrion. More people meddling in her affairs only seemed to anger Daenerys.

“What about Euron?” Jaime looked into the distance, the faint silhouette of icy mountains on the horizon. 

“Yara Greyjoy has sent a raven that she will take her ships to King’s Landing, but her fleet has been heavily decimated by the previous encounter with her uncle and she will not be able to confront Euron alone.”

“If everything goes as well as last time for Daenerys, we will have dragons burning down the city until there is no throne left to take,” Jaime remarked sarcastically, vividly gesturing how the dragons will rain down their fire. 

Brienne gently took his hand and turned to face him. They were not trying to hide their mutual affection in public, there was no use anyways. Winterfell was a small place with little entertainment on offer; everybody knew where Jaime slept and any gossip was most welcome among the castle’s residents. So far, nobody had made a derogatory remark about them, certainly owed to Brienne’s position. If Lady Sansa had decided she approved of Jaime’s presence and nightly activities, nobody would openly dare to question her logic. 

“Let us go to the dining hall, I am hungry. There is no use in thinking while hungry.” Brienne attempted to lighten the mood. 

Gladly, Jaime accepted the prospect of food and drink. Tyrion had once taught him to never decline such an invitation, not even during the most dire times. “As you command, my lady. And I have a gift for you later today.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A short chapter to explain the state of Dany's forces and what the plan for the journey is. Rhaegal will be flying with Jon of course because he's his rider now, damn it :-)


	9. The Gift

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaime has a gift for Brienne

**_\- Brienne chambers -_ **

**\- BRIENNE -**

“Where in the name of the Seven did you get this from?” Brienne was absolutely stunned by her gift. 

“That is my secret. Enjoy.” Jaime replied with a smug, satisfied face. 

“No, where did you get this from? Even Lady Sansa has asked me if I knew where to acquire some because the entire castle has run out and you know what she is like with these things!” 

Jaime thoroughly enjoyed this, sitting on some furs in front of their fireplace with a goblet of wine in his hand and a book on his lap. In the fortnight since the victory feast this had become his nightly ritual. Usually Brienne joined him, once she had to work late and had found him in their bed, still awake, waiting for her. She was surprised to find him there with a book he had taken from the library although he had told her he did not enjoy reading very much. Naturally, the book turned out to be about tales of knights and dragons, beautifully illustrated. The night she found him like this, he gleefully grinned at her like a little boy. He then proceeded to read to her the story of the Battle above the Gods Eye until Brienne fell asleep in his arms, lulled into a deep slumber by his soothing, steady voice. 

_ Is this what companionship means?  _

On his furs Jaime now joyfully glanced towards Brienne, who was sitting beside him, his gift in her hands, a yellow cube the size of her palm that smelled of lemons and flowers and summer. 

“In that case, my dearest lady,” he raised his goblet to toast his achievement, ”you are now in the possession of a luxury so exclusive in this battle-ridden, frosty shit hole that the Lady of Winterfell herself envies you.” 

“Do not call it that,” Brienne had to chuckle because he was right, “but please tell me, I want to know. Lady Sansa desperately wants to have some soap and all that is left is this disgusting bile soap they normally use for scrubbing floors.” 

After the battle against the dead everybody, everything had been covered in gore and while Winterfell had enough grain for many years, there were no endless stocks of fine soap for thousands of additional people. It was traded like gold among the desperate maids and ladies. 

“Fine then. It is from Queen Daenerys’ personal stash.” 

“What?! This comes from Essos and belongs to Daenerys Targaryan? Jaime, did you steal it?” 

“It comes from Mereen as far as I am informed, and no, I did not steal it. My brother owed a debt to me from back when we were still in King’s Landing and you know that a Lannister…”

“..always pays his debts, you have told me several times already,” Brienne rolled her eyes, amused at the thought of Tyrion negotiating for a bar of soap. 

“Also, Tyrion did not steal it either. He asked the Dragon Queen’s advisor for it, that curly-haired woman with the Unsullied soldier.”

“Her name is Missandei, I believe.”

“Yes, that one. She gave it to Tyrion after he had told her that he needed it for a lady he cared very much about,” Jaime triumphantly looked at Brienne, “and there was no lie in that. So the soap was lawfully and rightfully acquired.” 

Brienne had never been so happy about a gift before or felt so cared for by another person. Of course Jaime had given Oathkeeper to her, but this had evoked an entirely different kind of emotion in her. This little bar of soap in Brienne’s hands was a gesture of pure kindness in their frozen world of death and horrors, where anything beautiful and comforting was scarce.

“Thank you, Jaime. I do not know how to express how much this means to me.” 

“You could  _ show  _ me how much you like it in the baths” Jaime whispered with a husky voice. “Nobody would disturb us.” 

“I could,” Brienne quite liked the thought of this. “It is a bit late, but if we go now, we will still get enough sleep.” 

**_\- the Baths -_ **

**\- BRIENNE -**

“Those thermal springs are really the only good thing about this place,” Jaime was ranting again about Winterfell on the way to its baths, deep underground in the belly of the castle, but Brienne was glad he had found something he liked about the North apart from the books about dragons.

Brienne could not disagree with Jaime, the baths of Winterfell were indeed impressive. Since the castle had been built on thermal springs, warm water was readily available. There was the public bath, separated for men and women, with large basins and fountains for everyone to use. 

A bit more remote, there were several private baths for the lords and ladies and their trusted officials. Every private bath was in its own room, oil lamps burning along the walls to illuminate the underground darkness. The air was warm, heated by the steam of the thermal water. There was no furniture except for a simple wooden bench and a chest with fresh towels. The good soap, which was usually stored in a woven bowl next to the towels, had run out ten days ago and Brienne felt like she was holding a treasure in her hand when she placed the fragrant cube on the rim of the tub. 

Jaime closed the heavy wooden door behind them, and proceeded without further ado to take off his garments and put them on the bench to keep them dry. Brienne had learnt that this was a rather difficult process for him and jesting about it was not welcome. He in return had learnt to accept her help without sulking over it for the sake of practicality. 

_ He always had a servant for everything, life in Winterfell must be difficult for him.  _

He had already taken off his boots and cloak when Brienne walked across the room to Jaime, who looked at her with an expression of certain expectation of what was to come. Without words she unlaced his shirt, pulled it over his head and put it beside his cloak on the bench. Then she unbuttoned his breeches in a well-practiced routine, and he stepped out of them holding on to her shoulder so he would not tumble. 

He grinned at her. “Once again, the most difficult task of the day has been mastered.” Brienne hoped there was honesty in his apparent amusement, but knew that deep inside Jaime was bitter. Maybe he at least did not feel patronised by her help, but cared for, as Brienne felt cared for by having been given the soap. 

_ I am sorry this has caused so many problems for you.  _

Brienne decided to leave his golden hand for Jaime himself to take off, so she could get out of her own clothing. Jaime was a lot faster than her and stepped into the bath while she was still taking off her shirt. Now sitting in the tub, he seemed pleased with the world again and watched Brienne attentively while she stripped off her shirt and breeches. 

“You know, you do look quite graceful when you do this,” Jaime observed her with a surprisingly sincere tone in his voice. 

“What do you mean?” Brienne was irritated. 

_ Are you laughing at me?  _

“When you take off your garments, you do this so…elegantly. So mindfully. Like an important ritual.” 

“Are you mocking me?” Brienne was laughing nervously, disliking being closely observed and analysed by him. 

“No, I mean it. I like your…unrobing ceremony,” he said with mischief in his eyes, glancing up and down her body. “Then do not believe me, but get in here already. I am starting to feel lonely,” splashing some water into her direction. 

Now acutely aware of herself, Brienne stepped into the tub with more delicate movements than she usually would. She had expected to be intercepted and captured as soon as she had entered the water, but Jaime remained sitting in his chosen corner, still watching her patiently. 

This was not the first time they went to Winterfell's baths together, in fact they went almost every day. Hot water was, apart from snow, the only thing which was not scarce in this place and provided a welcome opportunity to get warm and release the tension from all their daily worries. Still warm and at ease after a bath, they then commonly went to spend time on the furs in front of their fireplace. On one occasion Jaime chased her straight to bed, teasing her all the way from Winterfell’s underground springs to their chamber to the amusement and shock of several maids and soldiers they encountered on the way. Brienne did not enjoy this quite as much as he did, feeling self-conscious about such daring public displays of affection, but cherished the pure levity of Jaime’s brazen remarks. 

_ It must be exhilarating for him to be able to do this in public.  _

Not expecting an immediate attack any longer, Brienne finally took her little treasure into her hand, taking a moment to think of what she wanted to do with it now. 

Jaime had picked up on her strategic deliberations, now watching her with excited curiosity. He raised his eyebrows when Brienne moved over to Jaime’s corner, sitting down beside him. 

Brienne dipped her hand into the water, wetting the soap, Jaime while watched her movements. Slowly, she raised her hand, water dripping from it, the falling drops making the tiniest splashes and radiating little circles as they hit the surface. 

After pausing for a moment of contemplation, Brienne planted a kiss on Jaime’s cheek before finally applying the soap to his shoulder. Jaime was taken by surprise, but neither stirred nor commented on it, seemingly enjoying the change to his plan. He had been outwitted at his own game. 

_ I know you wanted to watch me.  _

Brienne slowly moved the soap down his arm, back up his shoulder, across his collar bones, and repeated the process with the other side as he watched her patiently. 

“Dunk your head.”

“...what?” Jaime was forced out of his fantasy by this rather coarse command. 

“Your head, dunk it in the water. I want to wash your hair.”

“My hair? Do you always have to be so practical?” 

“Yes. Now do it.” 

Reluctantly, Jaime submerged himself into the water, using the opportunity to slide his hand across Brienne’s thighs. Sitting back on his place, he then obediently tilted back his head. 

Brienne ran the soap through Jaime’s hair a couple of times before putting it aside and gently massaging the foam into his curls. 

“I do quite like this after all,” he admitted jokingly, “I think I want  _ you _ to do this from now on.” 

_ You are lucky I enjoy this too.  _

“Only on special occasions,” she constrained his request. 

“What is special about today?”

“You gave me a gift.” 

“Then I shall give you a gift every day,” he turned around to smirk at her. 

“Wash it off.” 

Dutifully, Jaime disappeared into the water again only to find Brienne soaping herself in after he had resurfaced. 

“Let me do this,” he quite candidly spoke his mind, having acquired a liking to Brienne’s new method of washing. 

She carefully gave him the soap and turned around so he could wash her back, awaiting his comment on it. 

_ I know I am practical, just let me be.  _

He did not make a remark however, and instead ran the soap down her back while he kissed the space below her ear. 

Carefully not to drop it, he ran the soap up her left side, along her ribs, still kissing her neck, until he found her breast, making Brienne gasp. 

_ Fine, back to your game then. _

Solemnly, he put the soap on the rim of the tub while moving his lips to the nape of her neck, tightly embracing her with his right arm now, pulling her closer. 

Without much of a warning, his left hand found its way in between her thighs. A few days prior, he had found an opportune moment to ask her what she liked as they lay naked on the furs before the fireplace. This had embarrassed Brienne so much that she was too ashamed to describe in words what she wanted him to do. So she had to demonstrate it to him, which he enthusiastically encouraged her to do. 

_ You made me feel so lewd.  _

It had taken him a few tries, but he had gotten very good at imitating what Brienne had done to herself and she now even liked it more when he did it to her. 

She leaned back into his embrace now, easing into the sensation caused by his hand while he continued to caress her neck with his lips. They spent a long time like this until she started breathing heavier, moaning softly, and waves of intense sensation overcame her. 

This feeling had been known to her before, but not quite like this, not like with Jaime. He made her feel wanted, cherished, desired and as he held her in his arms she almost forgot how debauched this situation really was for her. 

Turning around after a brief rest, Brienne found Jaime smiling wickedly at her, pleased with his performance. 

“I hope you liked your gift, my lady.”


	10. A Lion in a Wolf's Den

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaime contemplates family, duty and makes a decision

**_\- Winterfell Library -_ **

**\- JAIME -**

The armies had left five days prior and Winterfell felt now even more isolated than before, an utterly deserted stronghold in a frozen desert. Anyone approaching or leaving would have to cross hundreds of miles of icy tundra with little in between, a perilous endeavour for the unprepared. 

_ Who was the person who decided to build a fucking castle here and why?  _

Jaime had come to like the Winterfell library more than he was ready to admit. It was full of wondrous books, but the history of the castle was strangely not among them, at least not anywhere he had looked. He had spent an hour searching for it, but now gave up and did not want to ask anyone for help. Jaime figured Brandon Stark might know, but then remembered how delicate their relationship was and accepted he would not find out what made this place special to somebody so many thousands of years ago. 

He did know, however, what made it special to him in the present. In a way he had not expected, Winterfell was the closest to absolute freedom Jaime had ever come in his life. The second closest was an incident in his youth when he ventured deep into the forest with his favourite horse, a black stallion named  _ Warrior.  _ Jaime had found himself off-track and got lost, unobserved and unable to be found by the garrison Tywin had sent to find his lost son. Jaime wandered through the forest for three days, alone with his equine friend, sleeping in the open air and eating berries he found on the way. On the first day, he was threatened by a wild boar which he valiantly fought off with his already formidable skills as a swordsman. On the second day, he nearly drowned in a lake after getting his legs entangled in some flotsam until  _ Warrior _ came to his rescue and dragged him out of the water. And yet, despite these hazards, Jaime felt confident on his own, blissful with his newfound ability to do whatever he wanted all day long. When the garrison found him on the third day, Jaime could feel the glimpse of freedom being wrest from him to be replaced by the constraint of Casterly Rock and his father’s constant watch. Cersei had been waiting for him that day, glad she had her brother back, but Jaime had found no joy in her embrace. It felt like being shackled. 

In the present, Jaime was no longer an inexperienced youngster and had a different perspective on his freedom. He saw it through the eyes of a man who had been forced to play a role for his entire life. Here in Winterfell he had no role to play, he had no responsibilities apart from those he had taken on for enjoyment such as sparring with local children - he was an infamous, crippled legend, but still a legend, so they were thankful for his daily performance. The castle maids were thankful as well, giggling every time they passed him.

_ I wish I had fought some of the Unsullied in my best days. What a spectacle this would have been. _

Jaime also did not have to play hide-and-seek games with Brienne, who did not try to deny his presence in her room, her bed, her body to anyone. Sure, there was gossip as had to be expected in an isolated castle with little other entertainment on offer, but with Lady Sansa’s blessing there was no open hatred to face. Jaime also did not have to play a role for Brienne herself, she accepted him as he was, or what she thought he was. She had seen him at both his worst and his best and decided that the the light outweighed the darkness. Jaime was not entirely certain about her judgement in this regard, but trusted her enough to make this decision for herself. 

Jaime had found absolute freedom, and yet there was this lingering feeling of being out of place. It had gotten worse since his brother had left with Jon Snow, it was as if an important part of him had been taken away. 

_ My family.  _

Brienne was his family now. She was the family Jaime’s heart and fate had conspired for him to choose. He had no regrets about making her his family and being her family in return, being responsible for each other. Brienne was the family where his soul was at home. 

But what about the family he had left behind? The family his father had always talked about? When Tywin spoke of _ family _ , he did not mean a place for one’s heart or soul. He meant a legacy of a thousand years, and the responsibility for millions of people who lived in the family’s territory. 

Tywin had done much to destroy the legacy he had claimed to be so concerned about. The people of the Westerlands had suffered under the patriarch’s tight grip, having lost many men to Tywin’s wars. There was no place in Westeros were the Lannisters were not held in contempt, they had betrayed every major House for one reason or another. Cersei had murdered the religious leaders of King’s Landing, a move the common folk viewed as a personal attack and still talk about every single day. 

_ The only family they possibly want less as their rulers are the Targaryans.  _

Daenerys did not believe him, but the people of Westeros both hated and feared the prospect of a new Targaryan ruler. The dragons were too powerful, too mystical, belonged in the books of the library Jaime was sitting in, but not a city. The tale of what Rhaegar had done to Lyanna Stark lingered in every tavern across the country. Many people remembered Aerys’ daily executions, the stench of burning flesh. 

Jaime knew that Tyrion had always cared about his family, his house. He wanted to be Lord of Casterly Rock and was denied by his father again and again. Cersei never truly cared about anyone but herself and was incapable of being a leader. Jaime and Tyrion were the last Lannisters who could save their house, the last heirs standing in a continuous line of thousands of years which would come to a halt with their deaths.

While Tyrion had been denied his lordship, Jaime had always rejected it. For Cersei, for worthless oaths, to defy Tywin. Jaime hated to admit it, but his past few weeks with the Starks had changed his perspective on this. 

The Starks too were an ancient family, a legacy of a thousand years. They were not hated however, people viewed them as honorable and trustworthy. They also did not hate each other, they tried to keep each other alive. 

_ They do not threaten to cut each other’s heads off.  _

They were no lions, but wolfs. While the prideful lions had pranced around on their conquered lands until there was no prey left to hunt, the wolves had built a den to keep them safe and fed. 

_ A frozen shit hole.  _

Jaime did not want to be a wolf. He liked prancing around and he was very much a lion - brave, strong, intimidating. But maybe the wolves had done some things right. Maybe the lions had done some things wrong. Maybe the lions too could be respected instead of feared. 

_ Maybe it is my duty to save my house, my people, my legacy.  _

Jaime felt empty now. He had not been able to convince the Dragon Queen to support him with his plan to make the Lannister army surrender without a battle. Her dragons would be more intimidating than any lion, but Jaime feared the destruction they will cause before the city fell. 

_ Thousands will die, all because Cersei will not surrender and Daenerys will have neither patience nor mercy.  _

_ No _ , Jaime thought. This is not how it ends. 

Determined to act Jaime made a decision. 

**_\- Brienne’s chamber -_ **

**\- BRIENNE -**

Brienne had always loathed needlework, but in the absence of maids or seamstresses who had time to spare for such minor tasks she had to mend her clothes herself. 

_ Maybe Jaime is right that servants can be helpful.  _

Pricking herself in her finger for the third time, Brienne cursed as she splattered little droplets of blood on her shirt. While she was assessing the damage, Jaime opened the door, without knocking, and walked across the room to sit beside her. 

“Are you hurt?” he correctly guessed. 

“It is all right.”

“Let me see.” 

He took her hand and could not stop himself from smiling at the result of Brienne’s attempt at needlework until she withdrew her hand, annoyed. 

“Brienne, we have to talk. About war. About family.” 

“War? Family?”

Jaime’s opening line revealed that an uncomfortable kind of discussion was to follow. Brienne swallowed and looked at Jaime, expecting to hear something she did not want to hear. 

“I cannot stay here and do nothing.” Jaime took Brienne’s hand back and looked her in the eyes with a kind, but determined expression. 

_ Please, no.  _

“I cannot stay here while the Dragon Queen burns down my army and King’s Landing while my sister and her pirate will willingly sacrifice every single citizen just to cling to power.”

“Jaime, you do not know this will happen. This…”

“Yes, I do, Brienne. This will happen. I have seen Daenerys’ strategy before in the field, she can only attack and burn and always underestimates her opponents.” 

“She is not alone. Jon Snow is with her.”

Jaime shook his head. “Lord Snow is resolved to do whatever Daenerys decides. He will make no difference to her plan. For all I know, she will not even wait for him to arrive and just fly down and burn everyone.” 

“Then what is  _ your _ plan?” Brienne was anxious, knowing Jaime’s plan would be dangerous for him. “The armies have left five days ago and you are here in Winterfell. You wanted to stay here until the war is decided.” 

“Winterfell is not my home.”

Brienne did not know what to reply. Had Winterfell not been their home? The past few weeks it had felt like home. It felt as if they were a family. 

_ I imagined us as a family, together, here. _

Brienne rose from her chair and walked to her window, overlooking the Godswood. It always looked so calm. Even on the day after the battle the trees were covered in a layer of snow, the big Weirwood tree in the midst of them, its crimson leaves falling to the ground like the drops of blood on Brienne’s shirt. 

Brienne could feel Jaime’s hand taking hers. He could approach so quietly, like a skilled hunter closing in on his prey.  _ A lion.  _

“Brienne.” Jaime felt the need to explain himself. “I am here in Winterfell because of you, and I  _ want _ to be here with you. But Winterfell is not where I belong. I am a Lannister. I have a responsibility towards my people.” 

Brienne now turned to face him, squeezing his hand tighter. 

“This,” Jaime gestured around their chamber, “this is our shared fantasy, a life away from our responsibilities. A life we are not supposed to have. You too are the only heir to your house and you know this quite well. The world does not end outside the walls of Winterfell, even if the landscape bloody looks like it.” 

Brienne was taken aback by this. She knew Jaime was right, of course. She was the only heir of Tarth and her father was ageing.

_ I must be a disappointment to him.  _

“This here cannot be our life, Brienne. I know we agreed we would wait out the war, but too much is at stake. I have to at least try to prevent the battle. And if I succeed and whoever sits on the throne in the end decides not to take my head off, I will have to take over responsibility for my house.” 

_ And leave me here. _

Brienne contemplated what had just been said. “What does this mean for us, then?” she whispered. “Is this the end?” 

Jaime exhaled and looked at her, still grasping her hand. “I hope not,” he quietly declared. “Not if I get to choose. But I do not know if I will in the end.” 

_ In the end. When either Cersei or Daenerys executes him.  _

Brienne was silent, again looking out of the window to the Godswood. Why had she been so naive? Jaime had never lied to her, he had told her the truth about his family, his difficult situation, but Brienne had wanted the lion to stay in the wolf’s den nonetheless. What had she been hoping for? 

_ A future for us. Far away from talks of alliances, and politics, and stocks, and farming.  _

“I do not want you to leave,” Brienne turned to Jaime, clutching his hand, “but I understand that you must,” she paused. “And I want you to have the best chance to succeed with your plan, so we will talk to Lady Sansa about it. She agrees with you about the Dragon Queen. She will help you.” 

**_\- Lady Sansa’s chambers -_ **

**\- JAIME -**

The Lady of Winterfell always made him feel uncomfortable. Sansa was sitting at a large wooden table, Jaime and Brienne across from her. He could see the guards on the castle walls through her window, observing the surroundings in case unwelcome intruders were approaching. Sansa’s piercing eyes and icy face conveyed little emotion, it was difficult to tell what she was thinking. 

_ If in doubt, she accuses me of something.  _

“So what you are saying, Ser Jaime, is that Daenerys’ plan of a quick siege and surrender is likely to fail because your sister has fortified the city and will sacrifice her entire army if she has to.” 

“Yes, my lady. That is what was under discussion at the meeting your brother also attended and what prompted Daenerys to  _ command _ me to stay here.” 

“I have no trouble believing that your sister would sacrifice the entire city,” Lady Sansa was cold when talking about Cersei. “Daenerys would not  _ want  _ to sacrifice anyone, but her methods make it likely to happen.” 

“That is what I told her as well,” Jaime agreed with Sansa. “But she did not approve of my suggestion to let me infiltrate the city and convince my generals to surrender.” 

“What about my brother,” Sansa was obviously concerned about Jon’s involvement in the entire affair. “What about the Northern army?” 

“If Daenerys decides not to burn the city, there will be an extended siege. I do not expect them to return for a long time and possibly thousands will die from disease, as always in such situations.” 

Jaime vividly remembered the long sieges he had witnessed as a squire. More men died during those times than in actual battles, shitting and vomiting themselves to death from the diseases they had contracted in their crowded camps. 

_ What had become of their families?  _

“What if there is no siege,” Sansa continued. “What if Daenerys attacks with her dragons?” 

“I expect Cersei to have a response,” Jaime answered matter-of-factly. “She has plenty of wildfire which can be launched with catapults into armies stationed outside the city.” 

_ As Aerys would have done.  _

Sansa exhaled. “If there is a way to prevent this, it must be tried.” 

“You will allow me to leave undetected then?”

“Not quite,” Sansa sternly glanced toward Jaime. “I will send a raven to Jon, informing him of your arrival at his camp. Your brother is with him and I believe we both know Tyrion well enough to be certain that he will help you if he can.” 

Jaime silently agreed, nodding at Brienne. 

_ I promise to come back to you if this works.  _

“And you, Lady Brienne,” Sansa rose from her chair, “will accompany Ser Jaime.” 

_ Wait, what?  _

“You have served me many years and I will never be able to repay what you have done for me. But I can see…,” Sansa looked at Jaime, then Brienne, “…you have to find your own path now. I wish to release you from your oath and hope to find you as an ally in the South once the war is done. Both of you.” Sansa made a satisfied smile. 

_ Both of you. _

“My Lady,” Brienne rose from her seat, knowing that resistance was not an option, “I thank you for giving me a home and a purpose. I will leave you with a heavy heart. I shall gladly be your ally and I promise to help your brother in this war in whatever way I can.” 

“I will miss your company, Lady Brienne,” Sansa smirked. 

“And I shall miss yours,” Brienne seemed to have an idea. “Which is why I shall not leave you without an advisor or protection. I want Podrick to stay with you until this war is over and you have to fear no harm.” 

_ Podrick fucking Payne.  _

“Thank you,” Lady Sansa smiled. “I know how fond you are of him.” 

“Then say your goodbye to your squire quicky, my lady Brienne. We shall leave tomorrow at dawn,” Jaime made haste. “We have no time to lose if we want to catch up with Jon Snow.” 


	11. The long way ahead

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Synopsis: Brienne and Jaime find themselves on a road trip once again

**_\- King’s Road, a ten days ride behind Jon Snow’s army -_ **

**\- JAIME -**

The farewell from Winterfell had been sudden, messy, and heartfelt. There was little time to plan their journey, as Jon Snow was already a week ahead of Jaime and Brienne, who would need a fortnight to catch up with the fast moving army. Alas, the majority of the Northern force was on foot and Jon had to make camp with Rhaegal every evening.

_The small folk who see the beast in the sky must be terrified._

As promised, Lady Sansa sent a raven to her brother Jon to inform him that he would soon receive two knights who would help him in his war efforts with her blessing. She did not include their names on the scroll because spies were everywhere, but was confident her brother would understand the message. Sansa also supplied Brienne with several letters stating that she was carrying out business in the name of House Stark in case they encountered difficulties on the road. 

Podrick had done his best to find two strong and healthy horses Jon Snow had not taken with him, a chestnut mare and a black stallion. Brienne’s squire was also quite competent in packing provisions and equipment for the long and cold journey. After the many wars which had ravaged the country, there was no guarantee of finding an inn every evening as many villages had been deserted and a lack of shelter could lead to a frosty death. 

Packing the few things Jaime had taken with him to Winterfell did not require much time. Brienne barely had more belongings and was always ready for a rapid departure. _Practical, as always._ After they had shared their evening meal with Podrick, which Brienne had used to give him detailed instructions on how to protect Lady Sansa, Jaime and Brienne said their goodbyes to their most loyal squire. They then retired to their chamber to catch a few hours of good sleep before rising early at dawn, long before the people of the castle would stir and make notice of their departure. 

Sleeping in her chamber, _their_ chamber, _their_ bed, for the last time affected Brienne deeply. As she lay in Jaime’s arms, weeping, he realised it was the first time he saw her cry like this. They had faced death together more than once and he had seen no trace of fear on her face. But now she feared the loss of her home, her family. 

_Is this the end?_

It had been two days since their departure. The first night they had been lucky to find an inn owned by a withered old crone who hushed her dutiful maids around with her cane. It was a small building with only three guest rooms, perfectly suited for not attracting too much attention from fellow travellers. They had a warm fire, some hearty stew with fresh white bread, and miraculously nobody seemed to recognise them. Today, Jaime feared, they might not be so lucky. 

_I have no desire to freeze to death in the fucking wilderness._

“Do you ever ponder over what Lady Catelyn would think of this?” Jaime cautiously observed the snow-covered forest they were riding through, wary of wild animals and bandits. 

“Lady Catelyn?” 

“Yes, Lady Catelyn, Lady Stark.” 

“What should she think of what?”

“Of everything,” Jaime laughed, “of every bloody thing that has happened since she released me from my shit covered cage into your charge.” 

Brienne turned to him in bewilderment, her black stallion following her gaze.

Jaime was both amused and unsettled by his own question, “Imagine Catelyn Stark found us on this road and we had to explain what we were doing here.”

“We are on a mission to support the Northern army,” Brienne tried to give a pragmatic answer. 

“Would you also tell her that an army of death almost destroyed Winterfell? That her son Brandon could tell her everything that has ever happened? That Jon Snow was now Warden of the North and marched on King’s Landing with Daenerys Targaryan?” 

“This information might require some additional explaining,” Brienne chuckled. 

“How would you explain my noble presence so far North?” 

Brienne mustered him sharply, “I would tell Lady Catelyn you had fulfilled your oath and her daughters were safe in Winterfell.” Brienne smiled at him, “And I would also tell her that you had come to fight the army of death beside me.” 

“Fight death beside you, is that really the most interesting thing I have done with you?” Jaime teased her.

_I want to go back to the baths._

“Fighting death is the most interesting thing for _other_ people,” Brienne admitted with a little smile. “And I would not have any difficulty explaining the other things either.”

“Oh no?” Jaime slightly lost his balance as he struggled to control his chestnut horse, which was just as indomitable as its rider. 

_Of course I end up with a stubborn mare._

“No, I would find it quite easy to explain, as I did with Lady Sansa.”

“What did you tell her about us? I never asked.” 

“The truth. That after all we have been through together, seen together we wished to stay together. Lady Sansa never questioned my choice.”

“So she did not mind us engulfing Winterfell in scandal?” Jaime’s grin revealed that he liked the thought of that. 

“The people of Winterfell hardly care for such mundane things too much anymore. And no, Lady Sansa did not mind. There was no need to explain that the situation is somewhat complicated.”

_I still have not told her about Cersei’s pregnancy._

“We should make camp for tonight. It is getting late and as it looks we will sleep under the sky.” 

“Do not worry, I will build us a fire,” Brienne teased him, knowing Jaime had difficulties with such tasks. 

They found a suitable spot in a clearing a bit off the road and made their camp beneath a hollowed-out rock. Brienne was indeed fast in lighting a fire while Jaime inspected what Podrick had packed for them to eat. There was dried meat, bacon, an assortment of nuts, honey, cheese, apples, and bread. The typical Winterfell cuisine. To Jaime’s delight, Podrick had also included a flask of Dornish wine. 

_Good lad._

After he had spread out their blankets on a dry spot beside the fire, Jaime invitingly gestured to Brienne, who was still tending to the horses, to sit down next to him. Once she had complied, he put another blanket over them to keep the cold from creeping up their backs. 

_I fucking hate the North._

“Will you cut some slices for me?” Jaime gestured to the bacon. 

“Of course, I think I want some as well.”

Jaime now accepted that it was more practical to have Brienne do those things which required more delicate manual work. He had found it degrading at first to ask her to cut his food as a small child would and felt quite useless as he watched her. Over time he had come to see it as a normal routine and even felt cared for as Brienne paid attention to cut his slices a bit thicker than hers, as he liked them. 

“Should we roast them?” He picked up a small stick. 

“Maybe put some cheese on it, too, and some bread.” 

_Smart wench._

As Brienne stacked the bacon, cheese, and bread on some sticks Jaime took out Pod’s special flask to drink from it. 

“Is that wine?!”

“Your squire knows how to prepare for a long journey in the cold. You taught him well.” 

To Jaime’s astonishment, Brienne took the flask from him only to drink from it. 

“Tyrion would be so proud of you,” he grinned. 

“It is good wine, I have to admit,” Brienne now arranged the sticks she had prepared around the fire. 

_Adapting fast to new pleasures in life._

Jaime looked at her quietly, contemplating the words he would use for what he was about to say. 

“Brienne, there is something I have not told you about.” 

“Hm?” Brienne absentmindedly turned the sticks to roast the other side. 

“About Cersei.” 

Brienne seemed startled by hearing this name, turning her eyes to Jaime. They had not talked about Cersei in Winterfell after Jaime had assured Brienne that he had no intention of returning to his twin. He had been glad Brienne had not asked any further questions about his ghost, at least for now, fearing the details would overwhelm her. This particular discussion could not wait however. 

“The reason I have not told you is because it had no influence on the choices I have made. It has no influence on future choices. I wish I could change it and I would not have to tell you, but it is how it is.” 

“What is it?” Brienne whispered. 

“Cersei was pregnant when I left King’s Landing.” 

Brienne made the same face she had made when Tyrion revealed Jaime’s secret during the game, a look of shock, horror and confusion. “And the father is…”

“I am not entirely sure. Maybe me, maybe Euron. Maybe some page boy she fucked in between,” he rolled his eyes at himself.

“How long until it is born?” Brienne kept her composure, but was visibly unnerved. 

“If it is mine then some time in the next few weeks, no later.”

Brienne swallowed, looked into the fire. “What will Cersei do when Daenerys comes with her dragons. Does she not want the child to live?” 

“Cersei will not be persuaded by anyone or anything to surrender. She has made this very clear. It will make no difference to her. It would not make a difference to Daenerys if she knew.” 

Brienne took a stick out of the fire, handing it over to Jaime, before taking one for herself. “Here.”

_I am sorry._

“Is this why you wanted to go to King’s Landing, Jaime?” 

_You should know me better by now._

“No, Brienne. Everything I told you was the truth. I want to go South to stop the battle to protect my army, my people and whatever is left of the reputation of my house,” Jaime paused. “And if I live in the end as a free man and get to choose, I will choose to be with you.” 

_If you still want to have me._

“And what about the child?” Brienne nibbled on her bacon.

“I do not know. I have not thought about it in depth because Cersei has lied to me so much that I am reluctant to completely believe her. If there indeed is a child in the end, I will think about it when the time comes. For now, I will focus on our mission and hope for the best.” 

Brienne was silent for a torturous amount of time, struggling to accept Jaime’s reasoning. “And you are sure you do not want to be with,” she did not want to say Cersei’s name, “ _her_ anymore?” 

“I am sure about that,” Jaime used the ensuing silence to start eating his meal. 

“And yet you made a child with her not so long ago,” Brienne was mumbling to herself now, adding some logs to the fire.

“That was a mistake which I regret now,” Jaime for the first time started to think about why it happened. “It was shortly after Tommen had died. After _everyone_ had died. Tyrion had been exiled. Daenerys was about to invade. I had not been with Cersei for a long time and despised her for what she had done, hated her even. But still, my sister was the only person I had left. That is not an excuse, I merely wish to explain.” 

_I should have gone with you in Riverrun._

Brienne exhaled, thoughts swirling in her head. “Is there anything else you wish to tell me? Anything at all? Jaime, it is easier for me if you just tell me everything now, so I can decide what to do with it. I can cope with it, at least I think, but I do not want you to have secrets. We cannot have secrets.” 

Jaime felt like he had betrayed Brienne already. He wanted to hold her hand now, feel the slightest touch as confirmation of their bond, but did not dare to reach for her. 

_Is there anything else besides that I fucked my sister, tried to kill Bran, and that I come from a family of murderous cunts?_

“I do not believe there is anything else you do not already know.” 

“Jaime, you are a difficult man, do you know that?” Brienne said, hurt shining through her voice, but also her usual kindness. 

“You mean _interesting_ ,” Jaime had put up his sarcastic facade. Knowing she would see through his mask anyways, he added after a pause. “I know. I know I am difficult. I want to be better than I was, but I will always be difficult.” 

“Then be difficult, but promise me to be completely honest to me from now on. This includes not only not lying, but telling me everything I reasonably need to know.” 

“I promise to always tell you the truth” Jaime searched for her eyes, knowing what Brienne needed to hear now. “And I will always be faithful, I am utterly yours and yours alone.” 

“Big promises,” Brienne smiled warily, then added after a few moments, “but you usually deliver on them.” 

“One caveat I have to make though,” Jaime felt secure enough to lighten the mood. ”I will not promise to not be difficult anymore and to turn into a little lamb. In fact, I can very much promise you to be an absolute pain in the ass until the Stranger pays me visit.” 

“I never expected you to be a lamb. I know who you are, Jaime Lannister, Lion of Casterly Rock,” Brienne managed a little smile. “And I prefer you as a lion, not as a lamb,” she confessed. “I like the honourable, valiant lion.”

“So do I,” Jaime’s heart ached at this. 

_And when I am with you it is easier for me to be like that._

“So you will not let me freeze in the wilderness, but continue the journey with me?” Jaime asked with sincerity in his voice. 

“I would never let you freeze, lamb or lion. And yes, I will go with you. We will figure out what to do. We are in this together.” 

  


**_\- King’s Road close to the Crossroad’s Inn, a days ride behind Jon Snow’s army -_ **

**\- BRIENNE -**

Their journey had been rather uneventful apart from Jaime’s whining about the cold and the stubbornness of Jaime’s horse, which continued to venture off-track whenever it saw a patch of green grass under the snow. 

“Stupid, stubborn mare. Do you think Lady Sansa gave her to me on purpose, as a punishment for my past sins?”

“No Jaime, Lady Sansa did not punish you with a stubborn horse,” Brienne was annoyed at both Jaime’s suggestion of Lady Sansa’s vengefulness after what she had done for him, and the horse’s continued non-compliance. “You should be thankful the mare has taken you so far. She has been very reliable and undemanding on this long journey.”

_She serves you right._

Brienne spent a large part of the days after Jaime’s confession about Cersei’s pregnancy in silent contemplation. He had picked up on her taciturnity, trotting quietly beside her, not wanting to disturb her thoughts. She was less angry at him because of the issue itself rather than he had kept it from her. 

Jaime was as vulnerable as he was difficult, Brienne knew. She knew he had kept this information from her because he had kept it from himself as well, pushing it away to that secret place inside his head, his soul, where his mind rarely entered. 

Jaime had done the same with what Tyrion had done to their father. Tywin’s death had remained unspoken between the brothers during all those days in Winterfell. If something was too overwhelming for Jaime, whenever he felt powerless, he put it in his secret place and pretended it did not exist. Brienne knew it would often come back to haunt Jaime at night in his dreams. She could feel him twitching, waking up. Sometimes she found him staring into their fireplace in the middle of the night. 

_Does he suffer from the ghosts who visit him at night?_

Then there was his jesting about his impending doom. Jaime was correct that both Cersei and Daenerys wanted his head. He did not put this knowledge in his secret place, it was too immediate of a problem. Instead, he chose to joke about it, invented the most creative ways of how either queen would execute him. Brienne knew that Jaime was rational enough to devise a strategy and defend himself when the time came. However, he had no way of soothing his soul. His heart was in an eternal conflict.

They would need to find a way to speak about those things. Jaime could keep his secret place and his jesting, but Brienne needed a way to talk with the serious part of him when she needed if they were to build a life together. 

_A life together._

They also needed to talk about how a shared life could realistically look like. The war gave them a reason to postpone difficult choices, but they could not go on like this for much longer. People would know, people would talk, there would be consequences for both their houses. Once Daenerys had hopefully won the war, Brienne needed to know in what capacity she would plead with the Dragon Queen for Jaime to keep his head. What if she found herself unwed and with child? Another issue which Jaime had undoubtedly safely stored in his secret place. 

Ironically, it was Cersei’s pregnancy which prompted Brienne to think about the possibility of children with Jaime. They had been taking precautions and had talked about not wanting to make a bastard, but there were no foolproof methods. And what about wanted children? If Jaime wanted to save his house as he had said, he needed an heir, as did Brienne. But all of this had come so quickly for her. Just a few weeks ago Brienne was in Winterfell, serving Lady Sansa, convinced she would do so for the rest of her life. Then Jaime entered her life, spontaneously and wholeheartedly as only he could. And now she was thinking about a life and heirs with him. 

_I want you for myself first, heirs can wait._

“There is an inn not far from here, maybe a mile or two,” Brienne diverted her thoughts. “They have good pies.” 

“Thank the gods, I am starved and so is this petulant mare,” Jaime had to guide his mount away from some grass on the side of the road again. 

“We should rest there for the night. If we are lucky, we will catch up with Lord Snow tomorrow by nightfall.” 

“I will do anything if I do not have to sleep under some trees again.” 

“However did you survive as a squire, as a commander? Did you always have a comfortable tent with a fire and a feast?” 

“Most of the time, except for when a Stark put me in a cage,” Jaime said with a nostalgic smirk. 

“Lannisters…” 

“You will be one of us, my lady, do not disparage your own house. Tyrion already takes care of that in abundance.”

“One of us?”

“Of us, us Lannisters. Once we get married you will be Lady Lannister.”

_NOT safely stored in his secret place._

“I…Jaime, I thought we had agreed we would wait for such decisions until the war was over. We said so in Winterfell.”

Jaime halted his horse, looked at her with longing and sadness in his eyes. “I know, Brienne. But I also said if I get to choose, I will choose you. At the moment, I prefer to believe that I will get to choose, so I have a cause to go on and do my duty. I am quite aware we need to discuss the details, but I do want to be with you if I live. Unless you do not want to be my wife.” 

_I need to learn to understand when he is being serious and when not._

“Jaime, I thought you were unsure if you wanted that, which is why you keep joking about having your head taken off in the end.”

Jaime spurred his horse, wanting to move forward. 

“That is not like it is, Brienne. I am unsure about the technicalities, but I want to make a marriage work. I do not console myself with the prospect that I will most likely die before I can make such a choice. I merely joke about it to make the danger feel less real.”

“I truly did not know this is how you feel. I was not certain you really want this,” Brienne whispered.

“Do you not want this?” Jaime looked rather surprised.

“Be Lady Lannister?” Brienne was amused by the thought of this. 

“Yes.”

“Would I also still be Brienne of Tarth?”

“That is one of the things we need to discuss.”

Brienne pondered on this, watching her beautiful black stallion as he trotted through the forest. 

“I would like to be your wife, Jaime, but I do not want to give up my house and everything I have worked for.”

“I would not want you to do this either. I would be very angry if you readily did, you are better than that.” 

“Then how should this work? You seem to have given the issue quite some thought already,” Brienne remarked emphatically. 

“I merely conceived a few different arrangements. Did you truly believe I would be with you every day, every _night_ , for all those weeks and not take our future and your honour into consideration? I am not a complete ass, you know.” Jaime looked hurt and insulted at what Brienne had implied. 

_I am a complete idiot._

“Jaime, I am sorry. Please look at me.” 

Both of them halted their horses, snowflakes gently falling down on them, the sky darkening in the dusk. 

“That is not what I think of you, Jaime, not at all. I know you care about me, about us. I merely thought we would talk about this at a later point, when other things were settled. I am only surprised, and glad, you have given it so much thought already, that is all.” 

Jaime looked down on his mount who had become unusually docile, panting steam out of her nostrils. “No, you are right. It is not the time to think about possible arrangements when it is not clear what we have to arrange. There is no point in thinking of the legal difficulties of making you Lady Lannister and Tarth in your own right when the Targaryan queen will dissolve my house anyways and exiles me to the Dothraki sea. And that is the best case in which I am allowed to keep my head.” 

“We do not know that,” Brienne tried to soothe him. “And even if she wants to punish you somehow we can still think about what to do in this case. You were right to at least think about different options.” 

“Will you regret all of this if I get eaten by a dragon in the end and you will forever be known as my…consort?” Jaime grinned half-jokingly, half-seriously.

“As your whore?” Brienne bluntly specified. “ I thought about this the first morning I woke up next to you and I would not regret anything. The more difficult question is if I would follow you to the Dothraki sea,” Brienne had to laugh at the thought of this. 

“Would you?” Jaime looked quite serious.

“And leave my father and island to their own fate? I do not know, Jaime. Maybe I would find another capable heir to replace me and take care of Tarth, and then follow you to Essos. I would probably try to change Daenerys’ mind first, I do not give up so easily.” 

“I warned you I am difficult,” Jaime smiled warmly. 

“That I knew from the moment I first saw you in your shit covered cage,” Brienne never thought she would look back to this moment with fondness in her heart. “Let us ride to the inn before it gets dark, it is behind the next bend.” 

  


**_\- Crossroad’s Inn, a days ride behind Jon Snow’s army -_ **

**\- BRIENNE -**

“Did you find Arya, my lady? I saw her here not too long ago.” 

The chubby boy in the inn had not changed ever since Brienne had eaten his pies here with Podrick. Jaime was visibly confused by this question - how did this boy know about Lady Arya?

“Thank you for asking, she is safely in Winterfell,” Brienne smiled at him. The boy had been among the few people who had shown her true kindness on her way to find the Stark girls. 

“Well, I will leave you to it then. If you see her again, tell her I am glad she made it home.”

Jaime looked at Brienne, bewildered. “Who was that, how did he know about Arya?” 

“They were taken prisoners together, they left the boy here. When I was here with Podrick the boy overheard us talking about Lady Sansa and proceeded to tell me that he knew Arya whom I had presumed to be dead.” 

“Is it wise, talking about your mission in public, my lady?” 

“Well, the boy sent us on the right way and let me know that Arya was alive, so I suppose the risk was worth it,” Brienne ate another piece of pie. 

“You are full of surprises, my lady. Is this why you wanted to come here or was it because of the pies?”

“You do not like them?” 

“I do, if I have to eat any more of Winterfell's delights sitting on the frozen ground I will choose to starve instead.” 

“Enjoy this then. In Jon Snow’s camp you will definitely get more of Winterfell’s delights on the frozen ground.” 

Observing his face, Brienne could make out the exact moment Jaime realised she was right. Confronted by his expression of desperation, she burst out laughing. 

“So you find enjoyment in my plight?” Jaime bantered. 

“A little,” Brienne could not get a hold of herself. 

“Oh, now comes the truth. Admit it, you liked dragging me through the countryside on a leash!”

_Gods, the whole inn must have heard that._

“I did not!” Brienne lowered her voice, still chuckling. “I hated it. I do not want you on a leash, Ser.”

“You want to call me _Ser_?” He grinned, tilting his head. 

“No!”

“Ah, you want _me_ to call _you_ Ser?” Jaime had found back to his best form, turning heads left and right. 

“Jaime, stop it, everybody can hear us!”

“Who cares, we are the best entertainment they will get all year.” 

_I do not want to be public entertainment anymore._

Brienne’s expression was more serious now. “I know I said I will not have any regrets if I end up known as your…consort. That does not mean I actively want to make it happen.”

“I am sorry, forgive me,” Jaime had stopped grinning and grabbed Brienne’s hand instead to kiss it. “That was inconsiderate.”

“It is all right. Let us go to bed now, I am tired.” 

“Do you want me to wait for a courtesy period of ten minutes until I pretend to go somewhere which is not our chamber?” Jaime was jesting again. 

_I will be glad if you do not chase me up the stairs like you did in Winterfell._

“You can go tend to the horses before you follow me,” Brienne rose from her chair, knowing how much Jaime would hate to go outside again. 

“As you wish, my lady.”

**_\- Crossroad’s Inn chamber -_ **

**\- BRIENNE -**

The Crossroad’s inn had nicer chambers than any others Brienne had seen in comparable establishments. They were simple, but clean, and with feather beds instead of straw pillows. The room’s walls and ceiling were covered in dark wood, possibly oak Brienne noted mindfully. In the right corner of the room, the fireplace had been lit by a maid when they had arrived and taken the chamber for the night. There was also a table with some apples, cups and a flask each of water and wine on it. _He must have ordered that while I was not paying attention._

From her window, Brienne could see the stables behind the poorly lit courtyard. Jaime had gone to the horses, affectionately petting his stubborn mare and giving her an apple for the night. He had also brought an apple for Brienne’s stallion and carefully examined the horse’s left cheek, which had a slight abrasion after the horse had grazed along a pointy branch. Having determined the wound did not require further treatment, Jaime petted the stallion as well and wished him a good night, as he always did with their mounts. 

Brienne was exhausted after their long journey. They had covered a long distance, both with their horses and their hearts. Jaime had been right that Winterfell was their fantasy, not their real life. They had not started talking about many serious issues until they were on the road together. 

_This time without him on a leash, at least._

Reflecting upon what Jaime had said about his uncertain fate and what he wished for their future, Brienne’s heart ached. Had all those years, all those struggles, been for nothing? 

_Nobody can ever take away what you have now._

Resolved not to be the melancholic on this evening which had begun so cheerfully, Brienne turned to a more practical task to distract herself and went to the wash basin in the corner next to the fireplace. With a satisfied smile on her face, she unpacked the little fragrant treasure Jaime had given her to wash her hands and face. She was not quite done yet when he entered their chamber and went straight to the table and poured himself a cup of wine. _He knew the wine would be waiting for him._

“His cheek looks fine, just a scratch.”

“Good, then we will not have any further delays tomorrow. Here,” Brienne handed Jaime the soap and poured fresh water into the basin.

While he washed himself Brienne put another log into the fire, made their bed ready. Then she turned to help Jaime take off his clothes and golden hand with their usual routine and then took off her own garments. Both then stepped into bed, she on the left side, he on the right side, as every night. 

As every night, they immediately shifted to the middle of the bed to face each other in an embrace, as if to make up for all the years they had known but not loved each other like this. Both had been accustomed to sleeping alone their entire lives, Brienne being without a companion and Jaime being thrown out by his lover before he could fall asleep. It had been more difficult for Jaime to get used to his new sleeping arrangements than for Brienne after being conditioned to hide his affections. Winterfell’s newfound licentiousness in the midst of euphoria of having survived certain doom had helped him to overcome his fear of being discovered.

Brienne soon ran her hand through Jaime’s hair the way he liked it, lifting her leg over his. “Come here.”

He kissed her on her mouth, her cheek, running his hand down her side until he reached her thigh to pull her even closer. 

As they rocked into their slow rhythm, Brienne made a decision. 

_If both of us live in the end I will find a way to be with you. I will follow you to the Dothraki Sea if I have to. We will find a way to make this work._  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this chapter I totally departed from the show (ok, already in the past chapters, but not much happened there plot wise). I hope you like the story I decided to tell and it will be a satisfying conclusion for you :-)


	12. Reunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Synopsis: Jaime and Brienne arrive at Jon’s camp

**_\- Jon Snow’s camp close to Darry -_ **

**\- JAIME -**

Lady Sansa’s raven had found its way into Jon Snow’s camp several days ago, message understood, and Tyrion was prepared for the arrival of the two knights. Knowing Jaime would prefer a few moments with his brother alone, Brienne had gone to see the camp’s maester to have a cut on her hand examined and to acquire more moon tea. She laughed at Jaime for this suggestion, but he knew this substance was always readily available around army camps for all the whores who followed the soldiers down the road. Brienne had not been pleased by the supposed implicit meaning of Jaime’s statement, and he had to reassure her thoroughly that this was not in any way how he meant it. 

Jaime, in the meantime, met with his brother in a tent. It was nothing like the Lannister army’s tents for commanding officers, which were draped in red cloth and outfitted with delicate carpets and furniture fit for a king. The Northern tent was simple, grey, with some wooden chairs and a rather clunky table, but at least it had a fireplace. 

Tyrion was cheerful as always as he handed Jaime a cup of wine. “Dear brother, I had not expected such a premature reunion. It was my impression you would wait out the mindless slaughter in the safety and beauty of Winterfell.”

_Frozen shit hole._

“Well, I changed my mind about waiting things out,” Jaime wanted to get to the essence of why he was here. “There is much to discuss, where is Lord Snow?”

Tyrion rolled his eyes. “The dragon, Rhaegal. He seemingly does not like being separated from his mother and brother, imagine that. Now Jon Snow has to spend some time with him every evening so the beast eats and does not perish from grief before we arrive in King’s Landing.”

“Even a mighty dragon misses his family, feels misplaced in this foreign land among foreign men,” Jaime noted silently. 

“That was unusually poetic of you,” Tyrion made a toast with his cup. 

“Tyrion, this is why I have come here.” 

“Starving dragons?” 

“No, family. We have to talk about our family,” Jaime specified. 

“You mean the two of us?” Tyrion smirked.

“Yes. No. Not only us. Our house, our legacy,” Jaime declared emphatically. 

“Have you turned into our father now?” Tyrion was amused. 

“Tywin was a tyrant and did the wrong things for the right reasons,” Jaime said more to himself than to his brother. 

“Jaime, what happened to you in Winterfell? You have become such a philosopher,” Tyrion comfortably leaned back into his chair. 

“This is no joke, Tyrion. What happens in King’s Landing will determine the fate of our house. It will determine what happens to our people in King’s Landing and the Westerlands. If Cersei wins, everything will go to shit, there will be endless wars to come. If Daenerys wins and Cersei does what I suspect she will do before the city falls, tens of thousands will die. Our army protecting the city will be destroyed, I strongly doubt Daenerys will allow our house to live on and the Westerlands will be given to someone loyal to her who neither knows the country nor the people. My head will be on a spike in any case.”

“Why are you so certain Daenerys will execute you if she wins?”

“She made her preferences towards me very clear. She will hold me responsible for Cersei. Rightfully so to a point. And she will need a public sacrifice to appease the population of then-destroyed King’s Landing. Can you tell me she has never done such a thing before?”

Tyrion grew silent, lines of worry appearing on his forehead. “So what is your plan then?” 

“What I said in Winterfell. I will convince my army to surrender the city. Without the Lannister army, King’s Landing is easy for Daenerys to take without bloodshed.” 

“And what about our sister,” Tyrion looked grim.

“I do not wish for Cersei to die, but I have other priorities than to save her,” Jaime was resolute.

“Then what is the plan for her?” Tyrion knew how difficult this was for Jaime. 

“I will give Cersei a chance to live, but she has to take it. If there is a peaceful surrender she has a reasonably good prospect of survival and exile if she decides to be compliant for once in her life. After all, she is not the one who killed Daenerys’ father, so your queen has a good cause to show mercy. Even if it is for Cersei.” 

“What about the child,” Tyrion poured himself more wine. 

_The child’s life depends on its mother’s reason, so it will probably die._

“If the child is mine it should be born any time now,” Jaime talked to himself.

“This sounds like you have doubts about your fatherhood,” Tyrion was positively alerted by this, eating some nuts. 

“I have my doubts about anything concerning Cersei. But if she is indeed pregnant and the child is mine it must be born until the next moon. I know that much about women, I am not a complete fool.” 

_I was a complete fool for bringing myself into this situation._

“I have no news of an upcoming birth. Varys has lost his little birds in King’s Landing, but a heavily pregnant queen is difficult to keep a secret. Even if she threatens to cut out her chamber maid’s tongues for talking.”

“You mean like her pirate does with his crew?” Jaime laughed nervously at this, thinking of Euron’s mute sailors. “If Cersei is hiding in the Red Keep, she might be able to keep it from the public.”

“But why? The news of an heir should rally the population behind her. She can tell everyone Euron is the father. A queen with a baby seems more benevolent than a queen with fire breathing dragons.” 

“As I said, I have my doubts and it does not affect what I have to do now,” Jaime wanted to change the topic. 

“And you are here because you want to do this with the help of Jon Snow without Queen Daenerys' knowledge,” Tyrion contemplated the meaning of the words he had just spoken. 

“I intended to go alone since I do not know if I can fully trust Lord Snow. Involving him was Lady Sansa’s idea.” 

“Naturally,” Tyrion looked proud. “Speaking of smart women. I assume the other guest we received is your Lady Knight?”

“I told you not to call Brienne that. And yes, she came here with me,” Jaime drank from his cup for the first time. 

“Yes, and...?” Tyrion wanted to hear a more detailed account of events. 

“Brienne came here with me and the plan is that she stays with me. Lady Sansa released her from her oath and wants me and Brienne to be her allies in the South once this wretched war is over.” 

Tyrion raised his eyebrows. “Does Ser Brienne know the full extent of how entirely self-destructive and murderous our family is, and what you have been up to until very recently?” 

Jaime thought about the promise he had made to Brienne. The promise not to have any secrets before answering his brother. “She does. She knows everything and she knows how difficult I am. But she also sees something else in me which she thinks is more important than all the rest. I am not entirely sure how justified her faith in me really is, but I am resolved to do my best not to disappoint her.”

Tyrion was not yet satisfied with Jaime’s answer. “Lady Brienne also knows there might be a child?”

“I told her about that as well, about all of it.” Jaime looked conscience-stricken. 

“And she does not mind?” Tyrion could not quite believe there was no problem.

“Of course she _minds_ , what else should she do? She was more worried about Cersei than a potential child though,” Jaime mumbled angrily. 

“Should she?” Tyrion whispered. 

_Cersei’s ghost will always haunt me._

Jaime stared at his brother, carefully considering his question. “Tyrion, I understand why you ask this question, but you and I have not seen each other for years while you were in Essos. You do not know all the things which have happened between Cersei and me. She did things I thought she was not capable of. I do not love her anymore and I now understand that she is not capable of love. I should have left her much sooner, I was an idiot for staying after Tommen died because of her.” Jaime was visibly angry at himself, shaking his head. 

Tyrion put his hand on Jaime’s arm, comforting him. “Jaime, it is all right. I know those years must have been difficult for you. But this is the past and you are here now and that is all that matters. All of us come with baggage.” 

“Brienne does not. She only carries my baggage on her shoulders now,” Jaime felt guilty. 

“That is not true and you know that,” Tyrion spoke softly. “I am not implying she is as _morally complex_ as you, but she certainly comes with a different kind of baggage hardly any man would be equipped to deal with.” Tyrion looked Jaime in the eyes. “Even if he likes that she is the best swordsman he has ever seen. Which most men would not, probably only you. But I can tell how insecure Brienne is, how she reacts to the slightest tease. I can imagine how her life has been like. I have experienced all of that myself.”

Jaime sipped his wine. “You can add that to my list of sins, there was a time when I teased her too. I packed her baggage myself.” 

“Then help her unpack it now. And she helps you unpack yours, you could need a hand” Tyrion made a toast to that. 

Jaime smiled sarcastically. “That sounds like a bad deal for her, none of her baggage is Brienne’s fault. Sometimes I do wonder why she puts up with me. She is the most honorable woman in Westeros and I am....” 

“The man she has chosen,” Tyrion interrupted his brother. “And she has good reasons because you have many redeeming qualities. You fought for her no matter the cost, and you always kept your promises to her. You love her for who she truly is, not despite of it. You care about her and want to make her happy. Would you deny any of that?” 

“No,” Jaime sighed, accepting his brother’s verdict. 

Tyrion leaned forward towards Jaime. “I know what she sees in you, Jaime. You know that I do and I always hoped you would find someone who sees the man behind your mask. I thought it was unlikely, but I hoped for it. You deserve someone who makes you happy and who wants you for who you are, not for Casterly Rock, or for your gold, or your army.”

“Thank you,” Jaime whispered, knowing that Brienne viewed those things as burdens rather than perks. 

_I hope I will not disappoint her._

“Will she be Lady Lannister, then?” Tyrion seemed enthused about this prospect. 

“If my head stays on my shoulders, Daenerys does not exile me to Essos, our house is not dissolved by royal decree, the Westerlands are not given to some Dothraki who will pillage the countryside, and Brienne decides to put up with my shit for the rest of my life, then yes. All of this remains somewhat doubtful.”

Tyrion laughed, still not quite believing what Jaime had come to tell him. “So you indeed want to restore our house to former glory and cleanse it from the stench of Tywin and our homicidal sister?” 

“You and I will do so together. You as Hand of the Queen will be fully occupied in King’s Landing, building up a government which is not corrupt to the core. I shall be Lord of Casterly Rock and rebuild the Westerlands into a place which does not rely on carving out gold from mountains and plundering the rest of the country.” 

“It must be hard for you to do this,” Tyrion raised his cup, smiling at his brother. “Dutifully fulfilling our father’s dreams he always had for you.”

“Do not sour this for me, Tyrion,” Jaime grinned. 

“I mean it, Brienne is not even a bad match from Tywin’s perspective. I am sure she has some distant claim to the Stormlands,” Tyrion seemed somewhat serious about this.

“No thank you, Tarth is difficult enough.”

_The Baratheon bannermen will hate it enough if I marry the heir of Tarth._

“How will this work? I do not believe the usual precedent for such cases would be agreeable to Lady Brienne. She would not leave her island to live in Casterly Rock.” Tyrion seemed genuinely concerned such mundane problems could end Jaime’s chance at happiness. 

“It would not be agreeable to either of us. Brienne wants to rule her island and _I_ want her to rule her island as well, but we have no good solution yet. For now we agreed to come up with something as the occasion arises,” Jaime shrugged.

“I will do some research when I find myself to have access to a library again. There must be a precedent. Where is she, anyways?” Tyrion enquired. 

“Went to the maester, she cut her hand,” Jaime tried to conceal the obvious. 

“Of course that is why she went,” Tyrion rolled his eyes. 

“Tyrion, you have to promise me something. I had no time to discuss this with you in Winterfell.”

“What is it?” Tyrion was alerted.

“When things go wrong, protect her, or just be there for her. I do not know exactly what might happen, but you will know when it does.” 

“Be more optimistic Jaime, Queen Daenerys is reasonable. If she burns every Lord who has a difficult history with the Targaryans or who slightly doubts her there will be nobody left to rule the country.”

_Like the Tarleys._

“Yes, still. Please protect her, and be there for her when she needs you. She is your family now, too.” 

“I promise to protect Lady Brienne with all that is within my powers and to be her family from now on until the end of my days,” Tyrion swore solemnly. 

“Good,” Jaime was pleased. “Then let us wait for your dragon rider, we have treason to plan.” 

**_\- Jon Snow’s camp, near Darry -_ **

**\- BRIENNE -**

Brienne had found her visit to the camp’s maester to be less uncomfortable than talking to Maester Wolkan in Winterfell, who had been both shocked and judgemental about her request for moon tea. _As if that was the most shocking thing he had seen recently._ Brienne had immediately regretted involving him, but in Winterfell there was nobody else she could have asked after Samwell Tarley had left to return to Hornhill. Having served the Karstarks since King Rob’s war, Maester Bodwin in Jon’s camp had a kinder and more pragmatic approach. He had been more concerned about Brienne’s request rather than judgemental, assuming she was yet another woman who had come to him because she had been raped by some of the soldiers, or bandits, or even ordinary village men who had gotten used to a life of brutality. Maester Bodwin was positively surprised to be assured that all was right, but still reminded Brienne to be careful on the road and not to travel alone if possible. 

Outside of the Maester Bodwin’s tent, some of Jon’s soldiers had gathered to make a feast out of a skinny rabbit. Observing the soldiers’ sorry attempt at preparing stew, Brienne then made her way to Tyrion’s tent. She was glad Jaime had some time with his brother alone to talk about things he might find difficult to discuss with her. 

_Things like Cersei._

Brienne also knew the brothers must be talking about herself, and wondered what Tyrion really thought of her. There had been little time for casual talks in Winterfell and Jaime’s brother remained somewhat of a mystery to Brienne. She thought Tyrion was intelligent, kind, witty, even charming, but his face was not as easy to read as Jaime’s. If Tyrion disliked Brienne or thought her entire existence was ridiculous, she would not know unless he wanted her to know. 

Did Tyrion think Jaime’s feelings for Brienne were a short lived infatuation the brothers could later laugh about? Was Tyrion only kind to her for Jaime’s sake? During their journey to Jon’s camp Jaime had told Brienne that Tyrion had been quite inquisitive about her because he did not know all the details of their relationship. He also said his brother was happy for them and quite forcefully urged Jaime to tell Brienne how he felt for her. Brienne concluded that Tyrion was probably fond of her if he entrusted her with his brother, who was undeniably a very difficult man. 

_Tyrion probably hopes I can give Jaime peace, an absolution._

Upon entering the tent, Brienne was greeted by a familiar scene of the two Lannister brothers reclining into chairs and drinking wine. She thought Tyrion looked strangely at home in the midst of the army’s camp, the weapons, the soldiers. At first sight the dwarf belonged in a council chamber, or a maester’s library perhaps. Tyrion however liked strategizing, and what he lacked in size and martial ability, he compensated with his mind. He would not fight on a battlefield, but devise a plan which would lead to victory. 

_Like when Stannis attacked King’s Landing._

Brienne thought Tywin had been wrong not to raise Tyrion as a leader and wondered what he would have done with a daughter like herself. Brienne could not be easily married off to someone like King Robert, not even with all the gold of the Westerlands as a dowry. 

_Tywin would have hidden me in a cave beneath Casterly Rock._

“My Lady, what a pleasure to see you again,” Tyrion jumped up from his chair while Jaime chose to remain seated. 

“Lord Tyrion, the pleasure is mine. I am glad to be here and to help Lord Snow with his efforts.” 

Tyrion poured another cup of wine and handed it to Brienne. “Well, I am glad you did not let my brother travel alone. He is not the most competent with mundane tasks like making a fire or saddling his horse anymore as you know, and the thought of him alone in the freezing forest quite frightens me. How he made it to Winterfell I will never understand.” 

Jaime frowned, sulking over Tyrion’s remark. “I am not completely useless, I survived the battle at Winterfell.” Jaime then looked at Brienne, “but it is of course much nicer and safer with my lady by my side.” 

_My lady._

Brienne took a seat next to Jaime. “I think you can manage alone just fine, but I prefer not to stay behind in Winterfell while you ride off into battle. I am glad Lady Sansa understood this.”

Tyrion reclined back in his chair, smiling. “So I have heard! Podrick will dutifully look after Lady Sansa, it was a good decision to task him with that. My brother tells me you will stay south?” 

Brienne was not sure what Jaime had told Tyrion about their plans, so she chose a conservative answer. “Well, yes. As you know my father is not very young anymore and I am his only heir. I will have to take care of my island after the war is over.” 

“Hopefully not only that, my lady,” Jaime added, smiling at her. 

“No, hopefully not,” Brienne almost whispered. 

The scene was interrupted by a visibly unnerved Jon Snow entering the tent. Rhaegal had made his nightly lair in a nearby clearing and eaten two horses, which Tyrion explained was barely more than an appetiser for a dragon. Jon Snow was mildly surprised to find Jaime and Brienne sitting with Tyrion, having expected them much later. After a short greeting, he joined them to listen to Jaime’s plan for a second time and to contemplate the risk of defying Daenerys. Jon Snow looked both relieved and horrified at Jaime’s suggestion of carrying out his plan without Daenerys’ consent. 

“My sister approves of this?” Jon turned to Brienne, knowing that Sansa had sent her knight and advisor to speak on her behalf. 

“Lady Sansa completely agrees if there is a possibility to avoid a battle or siege with many casualties, we should do our best to carry out this alternative plan,” Brienne reassured Jon. 

“We have a very large army, my lady. Queen Daenerys’ strategy could play out to her satisfaction. And I have fought and won many battles with lesser odds of success,” Jon was not entirely convinced. 

_A man caught in between two strong-willed women._

“There is no doubt about the strength of your army or your abilities as a commander, my Lord. But Lady Sansa is most worried about the North men she feels responsible for, of course. She knows they are not experienced with taking over large cities, and they are already weakened by the battle in Winterfell.” 

Jon ran his hand through his hair. He looked older than the last time she saw him. 

“Queen Daenerys has saved us all. Without her dragons, without her armies, all of us would be walking dead men by now,” Jon defended Daenerys. 

_She did save us. And she lost so much, so many._

“She did,” Brienne was sincere. “And the North shall forever be grateful and support her as Queen, but I have to ask you this, my Lord: If a queen makes an ill decision is it not her council’s duty to act in her interest even if this means defying the monarch?”

_I am not qualified for planning treason._

Tyrion approvingly looked at Jon. “We do not suggest a different goal than the one our Queen has chosen. We will take King’s Landing in her name and give her the throne. We merely suggest a different way to achieve this, a better way.” 

_That was better than what I said, maybe he can teach me one day._

Tyrion and Jaime exchanged a very particular look which could only be interpreted as a harbinger for scheming. _Lannisters._

Jon was brooding in silence now, his hand on his chin. “If we go through with this plan and it fails, we might have given the Lannister army and Cersei a decisive strategic advantage,” Jon turned to Jaime. “If they take you prisoner, you have much more to reveal than you were ready to admit to Queen Daenerys. Do not take me for a fool, Ser, Cersei does not know every detail about our armies. You know about our supplies, about how our army is weakened, about internal…difficulties,” Jon rose from his chair to pace around in the tent. 

_If they take him prisoner she will torture and kill him._

“You are correct, there is a risk,” Jaime affirmed Jon’s concerns, “but there is much to win. If the plan succeeds, Daenerys will have gained an untarnished city, an additional army who has no reason to despise her, and a grateful population who will welcome a new ruler who did not kill their religious leaders.” 

“I would like to have a moment alone with Ser Jaime,” Jon spoke absentmindedly. 

**\- JAIME -**

After Brienne and Tyrion had left the commander’s tent Jon remained brooding in silence for several moments. 

_When I was as young as him I had already killed a king, but was not as jaded as this man._

“You were correct about Cersei, Ser Jaime,” Jon finally spoke. “A raven has arrived from Winterfell. Bran has seen with his ravens that Cersei has heavily fortified the city. There are scorpions mounted on every tower. A long siege or destroying King’s Landing with dragon fire is almost inevitable.” 

“My sister never disappoints,” Jaime noted coldly. “And she has wildfire stashed below ground, I have no doubt, which she will launch into your camps.” 

Jon seemed to contemplate the prospect of burning to death in his sleep. “We have to think about this from Queen Daenerys’ perspective as well. She has little reason to trust any of us with our plans,” Jon looked at Jaime. “She lost half of her armies and one dragon to defend us. And that was after she had already lost against Euron…and you. Before she set foot on Westeros everything had worked out for her and now she keeps suffering heavy losses, even as she wins.” 

“I know,” Jaime replied. “This is because Westeros is different than Essos, even without an army of corpses. It is politically more complicated, and Daenerys is dealing with opponents who are experienced with waging war against each other and deploy different tactics than defending a single city. In Essos she faced a bunch of well-organised slave owners.” Jaime did not seem impressed by Daenerys’ prior military victories. 

_A horde of stinking desert Wildlings._

“Even if the plan works, she will be mad as hell we did not tell her,” Jon laughed for the first time, a nervous laughter. 

“It is my head she will want, not yours,” Jaime noted sarcastically. “Not all Targaryans are cruel and insane, you know,” Jaime tried to soothe both Jon and himself. “Prince Rhaegar was always reasonable and kind. I never quite understood what happened between him and your aunt.”

Jon was strangely taken aback by this. “Did you know Prince Rhaegar well, my Lord?” 

“Prince Rhaegar?” Jaime remembered the white-haired prince. 

“Yes, Queen Daenerys’ brother.”

“I knew him reasonably well. I was very young and had just joined the King’s Guard, but I had met him before several times at tourneys and dances. He was an excellent fighter. Not as good as Ser Barristan, Ser Arthur or myself when I still had my hand, but still better than most men I had ever seen,” Jaime imagined with a smile how he would have beaten Rhaegar in a fight if such an occasion had taken place. 

_I would have beaten him, he was more like Loras Tyrell than Arthur Dayne._

“So he was a warrior?” Jon seemed interested. 

Jaime contemplated Jon’s question and shook his head. “No. I believe he did not truly enjoy the thrill of a fight. Rhaegar preferred to sing, to read stories. He wanted to make many changes to the small council once he was king. And he loved his family, he loved his children. I am sorry I could not protect them.” 

“Well,” Jon smiled. “Daenerys loves her children as well, even if they are terrifying beasts who could raze a city to the ground.” 

“Which we do not want to happen,” Jaime added. 

“No, we do not,” Jon stared at Jaime intently. “So treason it is?”

“Treason it is,” Jaime smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to all of you who are still reading! This chapter did not include as much plot, but I really needed to let Tyrion have this conversation with Jaime. Also, Jon needed some agency and Brienne still needs to find her place.


	13. Dracarys

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Synopsis: The Battle for King’s Landing

**_\- Secret tunnels below King’s Landing -_ **

**\- JAIME -**

_ Reliable as always. _

Against all odds, against all reason perhaps, Tyrion had found a way to smuggle Jaime into the city. The dwarf had known about the secret tunnels Aegon the Conquerer had built as a way to escape the city in the most perilous of times. Jaime now used those passages to get close to the Red Keep where the Lannister army was stationed. 

The tunnels were narrow, dark, and wet, water dripping from the ceiling and collecting into small pools on the ground, making splashes as Jaime walked through them. The air was cold and mouldy, the passage only lit by Jaime’s torch. 

_ If I encounter a soldier I will have to drop the torch with my good hand to draw my sword and fight in the darkness.  _

The battle would begin at early dawn, in an hours time. Jon Snow had stationed his army half a mile short of the city walls, a distance Jaime deemed safe from Cersei’s scorpions, catapults and wildfire.  _ Unless Qyburn the cunning snake has come up with something new.  _

Daenerys would be coming from the sea on her dragon, and with ships carrying the Unsullied, who would undoubtedly be challenged by Euron’s fleet. With a little luck, Yara would be here on time to help them fight her mad uncle.  _ The Unsullied have no experience with naval battles, Euron better not attack them.  _

Jaime’s goodbye at Jon’s camp was the most difficult one he ever had to make. He had parted with his brother in dire circumstances before several times.  _ The night he killed father. Before the battle in Winterfell.  _ The brothers exchanged a heartfelt embrace without many words, almost a routine. 

Parting with Brienne proved significantly more difficult. Jaime did not want to bid her farewell, did not want to suggest their parting might be final.  _ It felt like daggers in my heart. _ She told him to be careful, not to take unnecessary risks. And she told him to be honourable and brave.  _ Foolhardy.  _ Instead of saying goodbye he gave her a kiss, an embrace. It was Brienne who stopped him when Jaime, with his hand on her cheek, uttered the words “I lo…”. “Keep that for later,” she said with a smile. “Now go, I will join you when it’s done.” 

_ Join me in death?  _

Jaime almost lost his balance as he stepped on an old discarded torch. When he saw steps leading up to the left, the glow of dawn shimmered down into the tunnel.  _ These are the stairs Tyrion talked about.  _ Jaime took a breath, and stepped into the light. 

  
  


**_\- the Sky above Blackwater Bay -_ **

**\- DAENERYS -**

The rising sun in her back, Daenerys Targaryan rode Drogon into battle, the waves of the deep blue sea beneath her. This was the battle she had prepared for half her life. She had made sacrifices for, bitter sacrifices. 

_ I wish you were here with me, Drogo. I will take the Seven Kingdoms for you.  _

But this was destiny, this was her day. Her ships had carried the Unsullied across the sea from Dragonstone, her brave soldiers who would gladly lay down their lives for her, their Mhysa, their saviour. 

_ Your sacrifice shall never be forgotten.  _

The horrors of the North still haunted her mind. _Jorah._ _Viserion._ _So much death._ There must not be so much death today, today would be different. Daenerys knew that despite her strategic advantage, King’s Landing would not fall easily. The men around her might think of her as foolish, but Daenerys knew of Queen Cersei’s tricks and insanity. Tyrion had underestimated his sister before, but she would not.

Daenerys had insisted on carrying out her plan of incapacitating Euron first, then destroying the scorpions along the city walls with Dragon and Rhaegal. Without those defences, a siege could not last long, the population would demand a surrender. Cersei would surrender in the hope for mercy.  _ Maybe I will even let you live.  _

Little black-grey dots appeared in the bay, well before the shore.  _ Euron _ . The pirate had destroyed Yara’s fleet before, but today he would meet dragon fire. Yara had not come in time with her new ships, but Daenerys had known this would be unlikely. Yara would be needed later to assist in the siege and to storm the city when needed. 

Daenerys could feel Drogon gaining speed, her courageous child. She would soon pass her own fleet, her Unsullied, to rain fire on Euron before he could destroy her ships.  _ You will not surprise me twice, pirate.  _ With a now well-practiced move, Daenerys dove into the abyss.

She could see the scorpions on Euron’s ships, the weapon she had encountered before in the Reach.  _ Do not fear them, Drogon. _

“Dracarys!” 

As Drogon blazed his fire down the Ironborn’s ships, Daenerys could hear the muffled screams of their crew, jumping from deck into the water to escape the flames. Euron had a hundred ships perhaps, and Daenerys would burn through the middle of the formation first, so the Unsullied could attack the remainder of the now disorganised armada. 

Then she saw him on the horizon.  _ Jon.  _

Jon Snow had come with her other child, the dragon still injured, but healed enough for the battle. As the man she loved was flying over the city walls to take out the scorpions, Daenerys knew her sacrifice in the North had not been for naught. They have had arguments, but today would be their day. 

_ We will take the Seven Kingdoms together today.  _

With Euron’s fleet decimated and disorganised, Daenerys signalled Drogon to join his brother and burn the weapons which had hurt him so much. Jon had already taken out the scorpions along the west and south of the city, now the defences in the east and near the Red Keep remained. Daenerys was ready to join them with Drogon, when she saw a bolt swish through the air towards her child. 

_ Jon! Rhaegal!  _

It had come out of a corner of the Red Keep, shot by an elite force, no doubt. As the arrow hit Rhaegal, the beast let out a screeching sound, just as Drogon had on that fateful day on the fields. 

Swirling towards the ground, Daenerys could see how Jon fought to stay on his mount until both disappeared behind the walls of the Red Keep, their fate unknown to their mother and lover. 

_ I cannot lose you, too.  _

More bolts were shot from the Red Keep, this time aimed at Drogon. Her dragon was swift to evade the flying daggers, further approaching his target. Daenerys knew she had to make a decision: retreat and leave Jon and Rhaegal to their fate, or burn the Red Keep as she wanted before and end the war. 

_ I will end this here.  _

“Dracarys!” 

  
  


**_\- in the Red Keep -_ **

**\- CERSEI -**

The Targaryan usurper had started the attack at dawn, as her officers had predicted. 

_ Targaryan whore. You shall feel my wrath. This is not how it ends.  _

Cersei stood in her bed chamber, her maid helping her dress in a simple gown a merchant’s wife might own. The queen had taken off her crown and most of her jewels, but several pouches of gold had been sewn into her simple dress. Currency for her upcoming travels to a safe haven where she would plan her retribution. 

_ And my traitor brothers shall share the whore’s fate. I will cut them into pieces and feed them to a lion. Maybe I will let Jaime live so he can forever feel the consequences of his actions. _

“My Queen, we must evacuate now according to our plan. The Red Keep will fall within a short time,” Qyburn warned his monarch. 

“I am ready,” Cersei hated her gown. 

_ Like a peasant wench. _

“We will not have much time to leave the city once I give the order, your Grace. But the diversion will be sufficient to make a safe retreat through the tunnels,” Qyburn was confident. 

“Are you certain Ser Gregor should not accompany us in case we are attacked?” Cersei was reluctant to leave the Mountain behind. He had been so useful to her throughout her reign. 

“I am afraid Ser Gregor is too recognizable for our disguise, your Grace. He shall remain in the Red Keep to fight off whoever tries to enter,” Qyburn had planned the Queen’s retreat without her loyal guard. 

_ Maybe Ser Gregor will tear the whore apart. Squash the imp into a pulp.  _

“Then make haste,” Cersei hissed. 

Qyburn stepped out of Cersei’s chamber and went up the stairs into a tower, a burning torch in his hand. A pile of wood had been placed on the open top and drenched in oil. Slowly, Qyburn lowered the torch, setting the pile on fire, giving the signal to the men of the Golden Company. 

In the distance, a sequence of shattering explosions could be heard. The city was ablaze, causing total chaos and disorientation. Qyburn smiled with satisfaction as green flames engulfed the central district, creating the diversion Cersei needed to escape the the Dragon Queen. 

**_\- the Streets of King’s Landing near the Red Keep -_ **

**\- JAIME -**

The explosion emitted from the merchant’s district, a shattering noise followed by the desperate screams of people. Disoriented and confused about what had just happened, Jaime turned around to see the green flames in the distance. 

_ Cersei.  _

Jaime immediately knew what his sister’s plan was. Her growing obsession with wildfire had been known to him. After she had destroyed the Great Sept to her full satisfaction, Cersei ordered her pyromancers to produce more of the substance, as much as they could. 

_ She is sacrificing the city so she can escape.  _

Jaime’s plan of infiltrating the city and talking the Lannister army into surrender had worked well until the bolt hit Rhaegal. Jon came down with the dragon on a large square near the Red Keep close to where Jaime had come out of the tunnel. Rhaegal had been injured beneath his left wing, but not mortally wounded. He roared and was angry as the Seven Hells at being hurt by a pitiful human. 

_ Do dragons understand why we do such things? Does he know this is a battle? _

Now on the ground, Jon still mounted, the dragon was soon surrounded by visibly frightened Lannister soldiers. They were commanded by Vylarr, one of Jaime’s most trusted captains and now leader of the Lannister forces in King’s Landing. 

_ These men are brave, but have no chance. Can’t the beast fly away?  _

Jaime could see how Rhaegal opened his jaws, the glow of fire in his throat. He had seen this before in the Reach when he had charged at Drogon, who proceeded to protect his rider by directing a fiery blaze at Jaime. 

_ That really was foolhardy. _

“Wait!” Jaime shouted to both Jon Snow and Vylarr, both of whom seemed eerily startled by Jaime’s interruption and sudden presence. 

“I am taking command of the army, we have to evacuate the city,” Jaime shouted at Vylarr. “Go organise the evacuation of citizens, the port is still safe and they can be lead through the tunnels. Get word to the City Watch to assist.” 

Vylarr contemplated the scene, unsure if he should obey his traitor-Commander or his murderer-Queen. “My Lord, the Queen has ordered me to…”

“The Queen has betrayed all of us, look around you, this is Cersei’s doing!” Jaime glanced over chaos and green fire engulfing the square before the Red Keep. 

_ The people are so scared they do not even take notice of the dragon.  _

Vylarr observed with horror as further explosions ruptured through the air. He too had a wife and children in the city. “My Lord, there is no time to evacuate the citizens, there are almost no ships in the port and the tunnels are too small.” 

Jaime already knew many would die. “Then try to save as many as you can.”

“As you wish, my Lord.” 

“And leave these men with me. I might need them,” Jaime ordered.

Jon Snow had turned his concern to the other army, Cersei’s hired henchmen. “The Golden Company will leave the city via the main gates. They will meet the Dothraki and the North men in the field. I have to try and stop them, I believe Rhaegal can get so far.” 

Jaime and Jon exchanged a quick, silent nod, before the dragon lifted off the ground. 

**_\- entrance of the tunnels, near the Red Keep -_ **

**\- JAIME -**

Jaime’s army had obeyed his command to evacuate the people, guiding them through the city’s maze to the few safe escape routes. Shortly after the first wildfire explosions, the Unsullied landed in the port after they had destroyed the rest of Euron’s fleet. Jaime had been waiting for them to inform a slightly irritated Grayworm that he had taken command of the city’s defences and there would be no fight, but an evacuation. After realizing that the Lannister soldiers were indeed not fighting them, but evacuating civilians, the Essosi guards joined them in their efforts to bring the citizens to safety. The Unsullied were using their ships as ferries to nearby shores and kept the streets clear for the people to escape. 

_ As they had done in Winterfell during the retreat.  _

At the main tunnel, masses of citizens were pouring into the darkness below to escape the approaching flames. The tunnel near the Red Keep had been built for the royal Targaryan family to escape, not for an evacuation of the city. It was too narrow for thousands of unprepared civilians to go through, almost none of whom had a torch to light the passage to safety. As both Lannister soldiers and Unsullied tried to keep the entrance to the main tunnel clear, panic started to break out among the waiting crowd. 

_ The richest city in the Seven Kingdoms and no fucking plan of how to get anyone out of here. Who designed this wreched shit hole? _

Jaime could hear Drogon screech in the sky as Daenerys turned her mount West to meet with Jon, who was flying on Rhaegal to stop the Golden Company from decimating his army outside the gates. 

_ At last, the Golden Company will meet their surprise.  _

Two slim hooded figures made their way past him, as Jaime saw the distinct ring on her finger. Tywin had given it to her on her wedding day, a large ruby embedded in the midst of emeralds. 

_ Cersei.  _

Jaime grabbed her arm as she turned around, her eyes wide with terror. 

_ Why did you do this, sister? _

“Let me go,” she whispered, but Jaime only tightened his grip. 

The other figure now revealed his face.  _ Qyburn _ . 

“My Lord, let us go. Your sister only wants to live,” Qyburn said in a soft voice. 

“What about the people of this city, your people, they also wanted to live!” Jaime turned to Cersei, looked down her slim body. “Where is the child?” 

“There was no child, you fool. You are as gullible as Tyrion and Euron,” she hissed at him. “Now come with me before you bring even more shame on your house.” 

Jaime shook his head in disbelief.  _ Come with her?  _

Cersei looked delusional and confident as always while her city burned to the ground. “We will start a new life, put the past behind us. Let the Dragon Queen have the city. We will find a way to take it back. I have made preparations.”

_ Cersei has gone mad. _

Jaime watched a woman with her small daughter in her arms, scrambling to get into the tunnel. She wore a blue dress, drenched in dirt and blood. The child had a doll in her arms, a wooden figurine with a pink dress and brown curls. The one possession the girl valued most and rescued from the flames. 

Jaime shook his head, whispered. “You have destroyed everything Cersei, you have betrayed your own people. You are rotten to the core.” 

Cersei sternly looked at him. “Then so are you, because we are one. And with burning down this worthless stinking city I undid the one good thing you have ever done.” 

_ The one good thing I have done.  _

If he killed her now, his pain would come to an end, Jaime knew. None of the soldiers would come to her aid. He could end her swiftly with his sword. But this one time, Cersei should not escape facing the consequences of her actions. 

“Arrest her, and this man as well” Jaime shouted at a group of nearby soldiers he knew to be loyal to him, gesturing at Cersei and Qyburn. “And take them to the Targaryan Queen once it is safe. Tell them Jaime Lannister sends his regards.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter took a bit longer to write, and thanks to everybody who is still with me! It was very difficult to come up with something plausible because I think the entire situation of Cersei holding King's Landing was stupid :-)


End file.
